Not What We Expected

29: If You Cared

Even after that Ant has given his word that he won't tell Dec's parents about the scars, Dec won't let him touch him. He doesn't even let Ant give him a hug, he just tells him to go over to the other bed. Ant can hear that Dec is still crying but after every new try to get over to Dec, he gets a warning that either he's staying over there or he can go home to his instead.

After maybe fifteen minutes the sobs go over to sniffles and eventually, it sounds like Dec is asleep. For Ant it probably takes more than two hours to fall asleep. He's just laying there, staring at the ceiling trying to figure out what he should do. Should he tell Dec's parents despite the promise and then most likely lose all the trust he's managed to build up between them?

When Ant hasn't fallen asleep for an hour he walks over to look at Dec. He just has to... And Dec is laying there on his front, dressed in matching pyjamas. The elephant has fallen on the floor and Ant picks it up and places him beside Dec's head on a pillow. He would like to stroke his hand down Dec's back but doesn't dare to because he doesn't want to risk waking him up.

He walks over to the other bed again and closes his eyes but the thoughts keep rushing around there, making it impossible for him to fall asleep. Ant really thinks Dec needs help, that's a clear thing. But the question is if it is Ant's responsibility to inform Dec's parents that their son needs that help. And what would actually happen if he said something?

Ant uses to know exactly what Dec is thinking but he doesn't know what and how much injury Dec would be capable of causing himself. On some level, Dec must have to know that he means a lot to Ant and his brother. At least he has understood the power of, "I'm not scared of losing blood and the idea of a few more scars don't put me off..."

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When Dec wakes up he sees that the bed Anthony was supposed to sleep in now is empty and all made up, but all his stuff is still laying on the floor. So it seems like he ended up staying... Dec lays there and wonders how it suddenly became like this. They both felt so happy yesterday. Dec was very happy, nervous, but happy that Anth was going to stay over at his for once.

This time he feels that the situation isn't fucked up because he overreacted though. Or the situation is probably fucked up because of him, but not because of what he did yesterday. Of course, Dec's the back laying reasons but the main reason for this conflict is actually Anthony this time! He was trying to claim some kind of right to tell his parents about what Anthony means is going on inside Dec's head. While he also had the guts to claim that it's 'because he cares'.

Dec thinks it's a bit weird that Anthony's still not back so Dec decides to get dressed quickly and when he has opened the door to his room he thinks he hears Anthony's voice from the kitchen. And yep, walking out, there he is, having breakfast and small talking with Anne.

"Good morning Dec", his Mother smiles at him and it seems like he forces up his fake-smile a bit too slow, "Everything's alright love?", she asks, but in a to that at least makes it seem that his friend slash boyfriend has kept quiet so far.

"Morning Decs"

"Good morning Anthony.", full name to mark that he's still not happy about yesterday. He pulls off a new fake-smile just so his Mum won't suspect anything. But he knows that Anthony sees through him, and that's the whole point, "We need to talk.", he says with a casual voice but when his Mother turns around to pour a new coffee to herself, Dec gives Anth a cold look.

Dec puts some yoghurt in a bowl and is about to leave again but his Mother stops him with a stern, "Declan, we're eating in the kitchen.". Then he decides he can't be bothered eating, not right now at least. He puts the bowl in the fridge and more or less orders Anthony to leave with him.