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chapter 47 - the big match

"the moment you looked into my eyes,

i knew that i had fallen, big time,"

k e n z i e

A car revved below. I opened my puffy eyes as I sat up straight, throwing my blanket off in the process.

It was Sunday. Johnny's big match. He had been so excited about it, so excited about playing for me. But I had ruined everything, and now I wouldn't be the happiest one who would cheer for him when he attained the scholarship.

He must be leaving now. I leaped up as I dashed towards the window. I had to send him off. I perched on the window seat and watched quietly as he ducked into his car and drove off.

All the best. I know you can do it.

I held the rails tightly as his car gathered up dust and drove into the distance, his heart moving further and further away from mine.

I had already lost the boy who used to treat me like a princess. A hot bubble rolled down my cheek.

Sighing and rubbing my eyes as more tears threatened to spill out again, I crawled back into my bed.

For the past two days, it had been a torture. I would drift around for a few hours, always ending up back at the window in my room, without really knowing what I was doing.

I liked to sit at my desk and pretend that Johnny still liked me as much as I liked him. Pretend that he was still spinning around in his chair cheekily, just hidden from view behind the curtains, playing a game of hide and seek with me. Pretend that he would pop out any second to share with me his newest pick-up line. Pretend that any second, his pen would hit my window and I could scold him for disturbing me again.

But he never did appear, and I was left to wallow in my own sadness as I cried my heart out. I didn't want to lose him.

His match. I had to watch it. I had to. Even if he hates me now. Pulling on some clothes, I fumbled for the door handle as I sprinted downstairs.

. . .

I rubbed my sneakers against the concrete floor in the stadium as I tried to control my breathing. After running out, I had borrowed Maddie's car and drove all the way here, before dashing up into the stadium.

Pulling my hoodie tighter around me, I looked up. I wanted to see Johnny's face properly, for the one last time before I go on to university. But at the same time, I was dreading it. That was why I had chosen the furthest seat from the field. He mustn't see me.

Aimless chatter buzzed around me as the audience enveloped themselves in a cacophony of voices. It was noisy. Why were they talking so much? I hadn't been exposed to much sound since Friday, with only my muddled thoughts screaming a thousand things out at me in my head. My ears were hurting from all the screaming around me.

The screaming. The game must be starting. Sitting up hurriedly, I listened out for the commentator.

"Welcome, welcome to the annual College Soccer Finals! This match is very important to all the soccer elites, for one of them would stand a chance to win a full scholarship to Harvard!" the commentator paused as cheers erupted from the stands, before continuing, "Let's give a round of applause to the judges!"

A couple of stern looking men nodded at the crowd from the screen at the sides. They must be the judges. Johnny was looking apprehensively at them. He shouldn't worry. He definitely stood a high chance.

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