bambam and yugyeom had been friends for as long as they could remember. there wasn't many memories they had without each other included.
but yugyeom had been keeping a secret from bambam since they were in the sixth grade.
he didn't exactly know when he crush started. and he thought it would go away. but it never did.
sadly, bambam didn't necessarily have crushes. if he thought someone was hot or attractive, he hooked up with them. bambam was possibly the most hectic person yugyeom know and it scared him. he was scared of someone hurting bambam, or bambam catching a disease. but bambam just laughed it off and told him everything was fine and he would be safe.
and yugyeom wanted bambam to live his life. he wanted his best friend to be happy. if anything bad happened, he knew he would blame himself for not talking bambam out of the way he lived his life. but he knew bambam wasn't completely reckless, he knew when a situation was unsafe and when to stay away but yugyeom was scared that one day it would be too late when bambam realized he shouldn't be somewhere.
bambam was an amazing best friend, though. the two had countless of conversations about anything and everything, which people never expected from bambam. people assumed he was dumb and only thought about hooking up and being "slutty" because rumors constantly went around. but bambam didn't let that bother him, and yugyeom looked up to him so much for that.
it had taken yugyeom nearly two years to realize that he actually had a crush on bambam. he thought before that it had only been platonic feelings but it wasn't. and he just wanted it to go away. and three years later, he still had a crush and still hated it.
he had hooked up with one person and it wasn't good. he thought about bambam the entire time and he felt awful about it. he thought he was disgusting for thinking about his best friend while having sex. he blocked it out of his mind but every once in a while he thought about it. the most recent time he did, he threw up.
yugyeom just tried to ignore the crush and see bambam as his best friend, but it never went away. he was sure he'd never tell bambam. he never wanted to ruin their long lasting friendship with his dumb feelings.
