Summer After High School

50

Brian

I replay the video again.

'I can't do this. We can't. I am in love with someone else and this have hurt her enough. I can't do this. I am in love with Paige Camille Benson.'

It's been over a month since this video went viral but I can't still help but watch it. Seriously? Kyle is a prince? It's been over a month since I found out but I'm still finding it difficult to believe.

I replay the video again as I sip my coffee. I check the time, my break would soon be over. I have to return back for lessons soon.

Alot of thoughts run through my mind, did Paige forgive him for what happened? The news was all over but it never stated what became of him and Paige? Are they together now despite the distance? Is she happy. I open the message space in my phone. I haven't heard from her since I left how's she doing?

I start typing a text to her.

Paige, how are you doing? It's been so long since I heard from you. Are you fine? How's college? I'm doing okay, though. And school's fine. What have you been up to? I want to know every single detail. How's Phoebe and Brenda? Do they still hate me? How's mum and dad? Hope everyone's good. I heard about what happened with Kyle, I mean everyone heard it. A prince, really? That boy is one good actor! He loves you, Paige. Do you love him already? Are you with him despite the barrier of distance? Are you happy, Paige? You might not believe this but I haven't gotten over you. I know you're getting over me but have you completely gotten over me? There's so much I want to tell you, so much I want to know but it would be better to talk about it over the phone. But I'm scared, I'm scared to  call you and I don't even know why. Constantly, I'm being reminded of the hurt I caused you and I don't even know if I deserve to hear your voice anymore. I miss you, text back please.

After reading what I just typed, I erase it. This is the hundredth message, if not more that I've written but never sent to her.

I play the video again. I want to know what's happening with you, Paige. Are you with him? I imagine her in his arms and it hurts, it really does but at the same time it feels good to know that she's happy. It's like I'm hurt that I'm not the one making her happy but the happiness I feel knowing she's happy superseeds the hurt I feel by a percentage of one.

I think I'm learning how to be less selfish. It won't happen right away but it will. I'm growing and I'm growing to be a better person.

I start heading back for school and I bump into a friend of mine from school. "Hey Brian, Class is cancelled! Wanna go play basketball? "

I smile. "You know I want to. "

We start heading for the basketball ball court and when we get there his girlfriend is already there. She hugs him and gives him a brief kiss then says to me, "Hey Brian. When are you ever going to get a girlfriend? "

I smile and look away. Seating on the other side of the bleachers is a girl with long brown hair, our eyes meet and her blue eyes sparkle. She smiles and waves at me. I wave back. It's sad how I can not see blue eyes and brown hair without thinking of Paige.

"Not now, Benita, not now. "

"Then when dude? You always curve girls, " my friend asks playfully hitting my shoulder. "What are you scared of? "

Alot.

"I'm not just ready. Someday though, someday not now. "

While waiting for the rest of the team to arrive, I log into my instagram. The first notification on my news feed is a picture of Paige. She's sitting on the bed cross legged with a huge smile on her face. She looks different, happier. And i am happy. I'm happy you seem happy, Paige. I double tap.

"Hey, babe look ! He's looking at a picture of a girl and he's smiling! " Benita grabs my phone to show her boyfriend.

"Whoa she's beautiful! Who's she? " He's asking now.

Who are you to me Paige? Are we friends?

"A friend. "

I'm a liar Paige, a friend Is an understatement for what you're to me.

"Just a friend? She's so beautiful. You'd look good together, why don't you go for her? " Benita asks.

I shrug. "She doesn't like me. "

"She told you that? "

I laugh. "I just know. Look the team is here let's get started already. "

Will I ever see you again, Paige?

"Sure man. "

We head to the open basketball court and get ready to start the game.

Are you thinking of me like I am thinking about you right now? I miss you, Paige. I have learnt alot from what happened with us. I just, I just wish you were not the one I had to learn with. I wish I had learnt alot before meeting you. And with all my heart, I wish someday I could see you again even if it's just for a few minutes.

The whistle blows and the game starts.

The end