Summer After High School

49

Paige

The one that got away by Katy Perry, blares from the speaker in Kyle's room.

Summer after high school, when we first met

I use my hands to trace the blue walls of his room, drawing irregular shapes. "You really do love blue. "

He's seated on the bed looking at me. "How could I not love the colour of your eyes ?"

I fight back the urge to smile. "That was a very brave thing you did yesterday, your parents and Princess Anastasia's parents probably hate me now."

He shakes his head. "They don't. Father is still finding it difficult to take but there's been a little change in their mindset. They apologized to me, Paige. This was something that had to happen, I had to stand up to them if not I would have forever been their puppet. I always wanted to but I never had the courage but thanks to you, Paige. My love for you filled me with all the strength and courage I could ever ask for. "

I sniffle. No, I won't cry. "I wish it didn't have to be this way. "

He stands but he doesn't move. "It doesn't have to be. I love you Paige, I love you so much. The distance might be a barrier but we can try Paige, please we can. I love you. The whole world knows now. "

I move close to him. "I know you love me and I feel something for you too but Kyle, I can't ."

" I promise you that I have nothing with  Anastasia, and any other girl. "

"Kyle ." I place my right hand on his cheek. "It's not even about Anastasia. This summer, this summer was the best I ever had because of you. It's almost as if fate knew what was going to happen and brought you into my life to help me heal, teach me things and show me that it's possible to feel something for someone again.
I do have feelings for you and I know you love me too but I can't, Kyle. All that's happened of recent Is too much to wrap around my head."

"I would do anything, Paige. Please. Just tell me what I have to do for this to work. I'd do anything, I love you, Paige. I really do. "

The music keeps blaring from the speaker.

In another life, I would be your girl .

"And I love you too, Kyle but I can't. It's just too much. There's college and there's you, a thousand miles away and you have responsibilities and
and.. "

"Paige, please please don't. I want to be yours and I want you to be mine. " He's holding my cheeks too now.

"This is the one of the hardest thing I've ever had to do, to say no to someone I feel something for. I feel a lot for you Kyle but it's all too much and too soon, I'm not ready to have a relationship with you. I can't handle this right now."

My tears wet his palm.

"Please don't cry, " he says.

In another life, I would make you stay
So I don't have to say you were the one that got away.

"I love you Kyle. But just because two people are in love with each other doesn't mean that they should start a relationship. I want to be with you but I'm not ready Kyle. Not now but maybe someday. "

He pulls me into a tight embrace. "Every day, I would pray that fate has maybe someday in store for us. "

I hug him back. It's one of the messed up things in life, to love someone and be loved in return yet still be unable to be with each other.

"Here I was thinking that the prince always gets the girl. "

I can tell he's trying to make me laugh so I laugh a little. "That only happens in stories, Kyle. I'm not Cinderella or Snow White. This isn't a story, this is reality. "

He laughs a little too.

"Kyle. I don't know what will happen when I leave here. Today might be the last day I would ever see you, and just incase we ever lose communication, I would not forget you. I can't forget the first person who taught me what true love was."

He rubs my back. "I can't forget the first person who showed me what true love was either. It breaks me that things are this way but your decision and welfare comes first, Paige."

There's another comfortable silence as I sob against his chest. My heart is breaking. I'm tired, I'm angry. I want to be with him but I can't because I'm not ready. I don't think he's ready either, he still has things to sort out. If we do this when we're not ready, we will ruin any possibility of it happening later when we're finally ready. We will have a terrible love story destroying the chance for a future beautiful love story.

"I'll miss you, " I say as I pull away. "I have to leave now, Brenda must be lonely spending time with our suitcase."

"I'll miss you too. " He kisses my head and then we start walking, hand in hand.

There's something about having last moments with someone your heart beats for and knowing they're the last moments. It fills you with this mixed feelings of both happiness and sadness. It's like a part of your whole being wishes for more with them but the other part knows that you just can't have more. And it's horrible, to wish for something that you know you can't have.

"Hey guys, that was quick, " Brenda says.

The jet to take us back home is already ready. I feel even more sad, seeing it.

"We didn't want to keep you waiting with the suit case, "Kyle says.

I'm quite surprised that Brenda understood the situation at hand and lost her zeal to break his head. A part of her is still mad at him for hurting me but the other part is happy about the way he handled the situation.

She stretches."Nah. I was enjoying the view of the palace. "

Mabel comes to hug us good bye and she says a quiet thanks to me for giving her brother strength to stand up to their parents.

"Good bye Brenda , Good bye Paige, I love you. "

Goodbye. I never knew that word could be this powerful because now it's making me cry uncontrollably.

Kyle reaches for me. "Hey, don't cry okay? There's social media right? We can talk, we can communicate, we can.. "

I shut him up by putting my lips on his. I don't care who's watching. I'm crying and I can feel his tears too. It's the last kiss I know, and a kiss has never been this powerful. It's passionate, it's electricity, it's light, it's sadness, it's happiness, our hearts are racing, it's like all emotions are fueled into this kiss, I can taste it. It's beautiful.

Then I pull him away and hug him again. "Goodbye Kyle. I love you. "

"I love you more. "

The guards put our suitcase in the jet and I start leaving with Brenda who's holding me. Just before I go in, I turn around to take one last look at Kyle just Incase it's the last time I'll ever see him again. His tears are still visible on his face. Despite the tears on my face, he smiles and I smile too. It's good bye. Then I walk in and I don't look back.

I love you Kyle but not now, maybe someday.