Life lessons (TW novel #1)

Chapter 15

I don’t know which one I’d say is worse… Nearly losing Nathan, or having him remember nothing about our relationship. The pain it brings me just sitting by his bedside holding his hand tight, knowing that when he wakes up he won’t remember me at all. It’ll give us a fresh start, a time to start over with everything, forget about our past and just create a new future.

Three long weeks have past, my rib is basically fully healed, and Nathan has been starting to respond when we speak to him, but has not yet woken up. I climb into the bed gently lying next to Nathan with my head resting on his chest and slowly drift to sleep. I slowly awake to the loose grip around my waist; I lift my head up toward Nathan’s to see him looking down at me.

‘Moring love,’ he says with a big smile on his face.

‘Morning Nath, I’m glad you’re awake.’

‘Yeah same here, but, sorry to ask this, but what’s your name love?’

My happiness fades, now remembering he wouldn’t wake up the same Nathan, he doesn’t remember me, so he won’t remember us.

‘It’s Kiara,’ I answer forcing a smile on my face.

‘I see you’re awake now Mr. Sykes, how are you feeling?’

‘I’m feeling good, got a bit of a headache, but good.’

He turns his head to face me, with his cheeky yet cute smile on his face, causing me to look away with a shy smile as I feel my cheeks burn up. I get up off the bed and stand right next to is, as the nurse flicks through her file on Nathan.

The nurse lifts her head and looks between the both of us before asking, ‘Are you two?’

Nathan and I both look at each other, I turn my head to answer, but instantly Nathan speaks, ‘No we aren’t.’

Shock takes over my body, words I thought I’d never hear, especially coming from Nathan, just hits me hard through the heart, I look down at my hands, thinking that I should just leave.

‘Would you mind if I talked to Nathan alone please?’

I look up at the nurse and just shake my head, but on the inside I did mind. I headed straight out the door without even looking back at Nathan. I keep walking past everyone, the only coffee machine in close distance, all the way to the waiting area that feels like a mile away from Nathan, which is only across from his room. I don’t realize the lads walking past until, Jay grabs my wrist spinning me around to face him, my eyes looking up into his.

‘Are you okay? How come your out here instead of in there?’ he asks looking back and pointing towards Nathan’s room.

I don’t answer him I just lean in close to him, tears starting to slide down my cheeks. I rest my head on his chest and hold my arms in close to my chest as they rest on his, he wraps his arms firmly around my waist.

‘They warned us that this would happen, sorry Kiara,’ he says as if reading my thoughts.

I pull my head back to look up at Jay.

‘I know it’s just… Hearing from Nath that he doesn’t remember anything about is, it just kills me. But the way he smiled at me, sent a spark between is, like their was a hint of recognition.’

The nurse comes out of Nathan’s room and walks toward us all.

‘He’s fine, apart from memory loss, so you can all go visit him.’

Everyone starts for the door, Jay stops halfway and turns back to me asking, ‘Aren’t you coming?’

I shake my head in reply, bringing one arm up to my chest, as my other hand brushes through my hair in deep thought. I know I have the deepest feelings for him still, but when he sees me does he feel the same way? It’s going to be a while before I can have him again, the way that I use to. I miss the way we used to be, he was the one that I wanted, and I thought I’d always have. That this one accident has taken the Nath, I know and want, away.

I have to let him go just for now, but I don’t have the courage to say goodbye to his face. I go into deep thought with, myself, before finally realizing that it is the only thing to do, leave and move on, instead of sitting through this long period of heartache.my thoughts are interrupted by loud whispers coming from Nathan’s room.

‘She was your everything Nathan, you sure you don’t remember her?’

‘Yeah ‘was’ as in past tense, and for the final time Jay, I don’t remember her!’ the last words Nathan’s voice raises in frustration.

This is all now proves to me even more reasons to leave while I can, even though I won’t like the out come. I take a deep breath, turn around away from Nathan’s room, and start to walk away, growing more courage and strength to fight looking back, with every step. As I turn the corner, I hear Jay’s voice ring throughout the hospital calling my name, I close my eyes trying to block it out and fight the urge to not turn and run back.