SKIPPING TIME

Chapter 29.5

                 

Ray didn't notice the thick tension between she and Jess again, he seemed lost in thought. Twice he began speaking, but tapered off. The third time he started a sentence, only to go quiet halfway through, she snapped, "Damn it, Ray. Whatever it is, you're making it worse. Spit it out!"

To Cacee's surprise, instead of looking at her, Ray directed his next words towards Jess. "I kept trying to say this earlier when you stopped, but I can understand why my daughter assumed I would tell her we were leaving without you and basically told me to shut up. On top of that, I didn't think you'd believe me if I told you the truth then. I figured you would think I was lying to get you back on your feet."

Cacee frowned and gestured for Ray to get to the point.

Looking more uncomfortable than ever, he continued, "But before we go any further,  you need to understand that Cacee can't get back without you, Jess. I have no idea if her charge is Positive or Negative and no way of finding out. Even if I wanted to send her alone with Digits I wouldn't because it would make the skip light years more dangerous for her."

Ray tried to say this whole thing matter-of-factly but came nowhere near pulling it off. He sounded awkward. Guilty. As he spoke, his eyes landed on everything but Jess. Good. She hoped Ray felt like a huge, steaming pile of crap since, in her opinion, that was exactly what he'd acted like.

She looked warily at Jess. His jaw tightened, and he said, "That whole thing about her not needing me to get home was a lie?"

"Yes."

She didn't miss the flash of fury in Jess's eyes, but he didn't say anything else, just gave a curt nod.

Ray turned back towards her. She took a few steps away from him, crossed her arms and made her voice ice cold. "What is it, Ray?"

Ray seemed to wilt as he started talking. "I've been thinking since we came down here that we'd split up when we get to the top. I planned on going to get the JETT by myself. But when we stopped I realized..." He petered out once more.

She shuddered, as if a spider was crawling down her back again. "What?"

Ray said, "The signals I told you about, Cacee? I'm assuming you explained it all to Jess?"

She nodded.

Ray ran his hand over his hair and leftover bits of glass hit the ground. "My signal is how they track me. But you have a signal too."

Ray paused for a long minute before he said, "If a hunter has a bloodhound going after a rabbit, and that rabbit is running around with two other rabbits, the dog will smell all three." His voice sounded weak and patchy, like moths had taken up residence in his vocal cords.

Her own airways tightened as she grasped what he meant. "You're saying that, even if we split up, they have our signals now. And since ours are tied in with yours, they'll track us too... use us to get to you."\

Cacee looked at Ray, wanting reassurance that this wasn't the case.

Instead, Ray nodded grimly. "I wouldn't put it past them. Your only chance now is to stay with me. We go get the JETT together, and I get you two back home."

As mad as she was, Cacee couldn't deny the hint of relief that they wouldn't be splitting up. Just because she didn't want to talk to Ray, didn't mean she wanted him to go risk dying. On top of that, as ridiculous as it seemed to worry about their relationship under the circumstances, she was way too uncomfortable being left alone with Jess with how things stood between them. She nodded, "Okay. We go get the JETT."

Ray said, "I'm glad you're okay with this plan. It's the only way." He sounded miserable.

She glanced at him and saw the unmistakable hurt on his face that he instantly tried to hide. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Jess watching her. She turned and met his eyes. Jess looked away.

She frowned and replayed Ray's last sentence. "Your only chance now is to stay with me. We go get the JETT together, and I get you two the hell out of here." All she'd really heard was that they could stay together. She asked slowly, "Wait. How will sending us home help? Won't they track us the second we skip? You said skipping makes your signal even stronger."

"As long as they have me, they won't bother with you."

She looked at Ray in confusion. "What?"

When Ray remained silent, Jess answered in a soft voice. "He's saying once we're safe, he'll turn himself in."

She shook her head. "No! Absolutely not! That's not even an option."

Jess and Ray exchanged a glance that said she was wrong—that it was an option. Their only option. It seemed as if they'd finally found something to agree on.

She shook her head again. "No! I won't go back until you come up with something else. We both know turning yourself in is suicide. There's no way I'm going along with that!"

Ray looked at her stoically. "We'll talk about this more later. For now, we keep moving."

She crossed her arms. "There's nothing to talk about. You better come up with a different plan because that part of the conversation is over."

She began walking, leaving them behind. Ray hurried ahead though, getting in the lead again, while Jess fell back. Shane left her side to go to trot by Jess. Ray once more held the flashlight. She realized they were once again in the same arrangement as when they'd started out.

When they'd first entered the tunnels she'd been too distraught to think about their positions. Now she realized they were protecting her, Ray looking out from the front, Jess taking her back. She felt both gratitude and resentment.

It was true that, when it came to survival skills, she seemed like the weak link. Until she started to compare the three of them.

First there was Ray who, in his youth and arrogance, decided he and his brother could single- handedly save the world. He'd ended up losing everyone he ever cared about and spent the last sixteen years on the run with nobody but a rat for company—spying on her in a desperate desire to have some kind of connection to the life he left behind. Ray was probably not a prime example of good mental health or the ability to make great decisions.

And then there was Jess, who thought so little of himself that he'd constructed an elaborate alter ego, right down to a whole family who needed him. Jess, who knew how to smile and kiss and promise, but had no clue how to trust. Jess, who'd apparently spent his entire life self-destructing.

Lastly, there was her. Her mom had a hard life. At a young age, she learned it was a bad idea to depend on people. Because of that, her mom raised to stand on her own, to believe in her own abilities and to never count on anyone else to fill her needs. Her mom had pushed and prodded her, but she'd also given her unequivocal love and faith in her own abilities.

So who was the weak link? Cacee squared her shoulders. She would bet the clothes on her back—which were the better part of everything she currently owned—that, despite how confused she was on her feelings for Jess,  it wasn't her. And, however she personally felt about them right now, she was determined both Jess and Ray would return to their own time safely. She would not let Ray turn himself in and die for her. She would not let Jess give in to his clearly suicidal urges and fight some monster five times his size, or taunt someone into a knife battle. She shook her head. No doubt Jess wanted to go down in a blaze of glory. Of course, she wasn't sure how she'd stop him, but she was certain she could figure out something.

She bent and picked up a handful of rocks from one of the piles strewn across the stairs. Although she shoved most of them in the backpack still hanging off her shoulder, she held onto one of them. In her other hand, she clutched her slingshot. Ahead of her, the flashlight Ray held cut a swath across the gloom. It was only one small beam of light, but it shone steady and true. And sometimes it was the smallest things that made the difference between endless darkness and the promise of another day.