MerAdd Oneshots

Dance with me

I never truly did understand how the human brain works. I suppose that's why I never went into neurosurgery; because the human brain is a strange thing.

Sure, as a doctor I knew the scientific parts of the brain. I knew the cerebellum from the medulla and all the different functions of each individual part. I knew all of the chemicals that made brains function properly, or as properly as they could. But there was so much more to the brain than just science.

A brain holds everything; your thoughts, your memories, your personality. Holding a brain in med school was almost a surreal feeling for me. I was holding in my hands the complete life of another person who had lived, loved, laughed and lost. I was amazed, but also quite saddened that somebody had to die in order to let me have this life changing experience.

It was then that I realized that while the heart may be romanticized, the brain was where love came from. Metaphors be damned, without that brain you wouldn't feel a thing; especially not love for another person.

Brains were an extraordinary thing. And so was she.

I don't know what possessed me that night in Joe's bar, I don't know if my brain was going rogue and doing things on its own or if I was just more intoxicated than I'd originally thought. But my brain wasn't attached to my body that night, when I approached her.

"Addison" she smiled at me, a drink in her hand. She was beautiful; with her hair messy from a days work, her mascara slightly smudged and her smile greeting me happily. She was beautiful.

"Sit down with me, have a drink, I'm buying" she winked, and scooted inside the booth she was sitting at. My body hummed and my heart raced and while I knew tonight was the same as any other night (she'd bought me drinks before, and I'd returned the favour plenty of times over late night chats and drunken conversations) it felt different.

My brain was telling me something was different, I just didn't know what yet.

"I haven't seen you around lately, I was starting to think you were avoiding me" she leans her elbow on the table, and places her head on the palm of her hand "how've you been?"

Truthfully, I had been avoiding her. I was feeling things I didn't know I could feel for her, things I'd never felt before and that I knew I'd never feel again. I wasn't sure how to cope, how to act, but I couldn't stay away from her forever. Even if I wanted to, which I had tried, I couldn't. I would never want to stay away from her.

"I've been busy. Work has been busy for me so I've been tired" I say casually, stirring my drink with the straw "but I'm good. How've you been?" It were almost as if every single muscle in my body relaxed. Being back here with her again felt natural, something I never knew I needed so badly until now.

"I've missed you, Addie" she confesses "talking to you, spending time with you, it makes me happy. I was worried about you when you stopped showing up" she looks me right in the eye, and I know now tonight will be different.

"Dance with me" I say abruptly, standing up and offering her my hand "you love to dance; consider this me making up for not being here lately" as much as I know I suck at dancing, I just wanted to see her smile. And when she did, when she stood up and took my hand with a big grin on her lips, I knew I didn't care if I sucked at dancing.

I only cared about her.

"You know" she says, as we dance to the beat of the song Joe's got playing "I never would've expected you to ever ask me to dance" she puts her hands above her head and reaches for the sky, for the stars, for the moon. Her hair fell around her in tendrils of gold, curls bouncing with the beat of the music.

"I wanted to make it up to you" I tell her, as the song changes to a slower one. Wordlessly, I put my arms around her and hold her close, now slow dancing to the soft beat.

"I want you to know" she states, tucking a loose strand of hair behind my ear "that I have been drinking, but I am not drunk. The alcohol tonight was liquid courage and I mean everything I do and say"

I laugh "Thats what people say when they're drunk. You're drunk, Meredith" she doesn't look drunk, but I figured she was. She had to be. My brain was telling me that tonight was different, but I almost couldn't believe it. Especially not now.

"I'm not drunk" and without another word, she leans in and kisses me. Gently, tentatively, her lips touch mine and while it takes me a minute to register that this is actually happening, I eventually respond and when I do she becomes less tentative and more sure.

"Are you gonna remember that even happened in the morning?" I ask, once we've parted. I'm breathless, she took every breath from my lungs and made them her own, every beat of my heart belonged to her and my thoughts were drowning in her, her, her.

"I would never forget this, not in a million years. This is imprinted on my brain for life"

Funny, how brains work. Because mine was telling me I wouldn't forget this either.