"So, you can see ghosts that aren't really there?"
"I can see their spirit."
"Can you tell them I love them?"
"They know, and they love you too."
****
Summary in book
This plot is from @MsMarauders and is by @sadiesinkers
Cover by @-emmahayley-
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( OLIVIA )
HOGWARTS DECEMBER, 2015
Olivia was used to people staring at her. They stared at her when she got perfect marks in class, they stared at her when she strived to be perfect, they stared at her when she punched her ex - boyfriend. People were always staring at her. She never really minded it, she never paid too much attention to it. She wasn't trying to be perfect for them, she never tried to have control for them.
Olivia always needed to have control in situations. Ever since the time she lost control, all she wanted to have was control. She needed control over her magic, control over her grades, control over her emotions. She would never stop until she had control. Even if she was spiraling downwards, falling from a cliff, free falling, she would find a way to gain control.
She didn't know how to do that anymore. She didn't know how to get everything under control. She was reaching for it, grabbing at any strands she could reach but it only made it unravel more.
Professor McGonagall waited patiently for Olivia to take a seat. Once she did, Olivia looked straight into McGonagall's eyes and forced herself not to look at her hands in her lap. "Are you alright Ms. Cavalli?"
Olivia shrugged, "Fine. How are you?"
"We're not here to talk about me. What happened in class today?" Olivia broke eye contact and looked away chewing on her lip. McGonagall waited for Olivia, not disrupting the silence.
"When I was ten years old, at the time I didn't know I was a witch. My dad was coming home from work at the time and my mum and I got into a fight. I don't know when it happened, but I guess some small flames or something flew from my fingers and before I knew it, the house was on fire. I was yelling for my mum while I was being choked by smoke. When I was on the verge of passing out, my dad got home from work and dragged me outside. My mum died in a fire that I caused."
Olivia didn't want to hear 'it's not your fault' anymore. It didn't matter if it was her fault or not, she still felt responsible. It didn't matter what people said, what she thought still affected her and she was still paying.
"That doesn't mean you have to be tortured by it anymore." Olivia wanted to fold in on herself. She wanted to curl up like she was a little kid again. She wasn't ready to grow up. "Only you can make them stop."
"I don't know how to do that."
Olivia didn't know how to take care of herself. She didn't know how to fix herself. How was she meant to help anyone if she couldn't even pull herself together and get passed her nightmares from six years ago. Emery is going crazy, Brett is a recovering alcoholic, Teddy has no parents, and Ashley was always the second choice. How is Olivia supposed to be there for them if she couldn't even get past her own demons following her.
"You have to accept what happened. You can't change it, no matter what you do. You have to come to terms of who you are, what happened, and who you want to be." Olivia nodded, a new understanding going through her head. She knew it was going to be easier said than done, but she was done being controlled by her own past.
"Thank you." Olivia collected herself and left the room, going out to her common room. There, she did some thinking. She never knew what she wanted to do before. She always thought she would be a curse breaker or something but she knew what she really wanted to do now. She wanted to change people's lives in some way. Being around McGonagall, she sees how many respect her but at the same time love her. She heard stories about the Marauders and Harry Potter and she now knew that McGonagall was always there and helped them. Olivia wanted to be a professor.
