Forever Yours

Past

Octavia

I dashed up to Ontari.  She had practically been impossible to find since we got here, either busy exploring or hiding somewhere.

"Hey Octavia." She greeted, giving me a small smile.

I smiled back, "Good to see you."

She dipped her head in a nod, "You too."

My curiosity over her and Echo returned.  She seemed to know the former Azgeda general and I was just too curious to let it go at that.

She chuckled, "What's on your mind?"

When I gave her a surprised look she burst out laughing for a moment before gathering herself.

"I can practically hear you thinking."

I blushed slightly, chuckling uncomfortably, "I was just wondering about you and Echo." I admitted.

"Oh." It was soft, quiet, much like how she always got when someone brought up her past.

"If you don't want to we don't have to talk about it!" I backtracked.

She gave me a small smile, "It's alright." She assured, looking around, "Just somewhere more private."

I nodded, looking out towards the forest as she headed for it, following.

We walked a ways into it before she stopped, leaning back against a tree.  I leaned back against one that was practically directly across from her, nodding to begin when ready.

She let out a breath, "As you already know, Nia broke the law and cut each child shortly after birth in the hopes of finding a Natblida.  It just so happens she found one - me.  I grew up in the palace, never knowing my parents - only knowing Nia's cruelty." She paused and I started to speak but she swept on.

"As you also know, I should have fought in the Conclave that made Lexa Commander since I'm only a year and half younger than her.  Nia spent the first few years disciplining me on what I was to do - which was follow her with no question at all - and what happened when I displeased her." Ontari turned her head slightly, allowing the scars on her face to catch light for a moment and I knew what she meant.

"I lived like that.  In constant fear of Nia's wrath.  I could do exactly what I was supposed to and still get hurt.  I can't count the number of times she almost killed me, or the fact that she wouldn't let me get medical treatment almost killed me.  I met Roan when I was fairly young, ten or eleven." She sighed.

"When he first met me, I was just a battered girl with a broken spirit.  He was almost five years older than me and yet he devoted so much time to trying to help me.  He taught me the true ways of being a Commander.  He taught me about being a good leader and a good person.  He gave me faith that not only could I live through Nia's cruelty but that I didn't have to be like her." Ontari smiled, "He saved me.  Both literally from multiple injuries and figuratively."

"It was a couple years later that I had come to think of him as an older brother, my protector.  The person who shone light into my world.  That was when I met Echo.  He couldn't sneak in to see me so he sent Echo in his place, knowing that she hated Nia as much as we both did and wouldn't betray us.  She helped him and helped me.  Between the two of them I can't recall a time where I felt alone."

Ontari paused, sighing, "I came to think of her as my sister over the years.  Of course, she's a couple years older than me but still closer than Roan and I in age.  Eventually, word of the Skai people reached us.  Nia was furious and, had it not been the fact that Trikru was in the way, would have marched instantly.  As it was, she looked for any opportunity but found none.  Echo at one point disappeared, captured by the Maunon (Mountain Men).  The Mountain fell and still she hated the Skai people and had her army march on Polis.  Echo returned to her place as Nia's general and she banished Roan when he protested against the march on Polis and she sent out a hunt for Wanheda." Ontari paused again.

"Echo made sure to care for me as best she could without getting herself killed but I could see the stress it put on her.  At one point, I offered her a way out of helping me but she refused.  She would have preferred to die trying to help me than stop helping me.  Eventually she was given her mission to help destroy Mount Weather with the Skai people in it.  She hated it but knew she had to do it to survive, so she left."

Ontari sighed, shadows flickering in her eyes, "She returned successful and Nia couldn't have been more pleased.  She was taken prisoner by Lexa's people when they came to the palace and I was forced to go with her.  Echo wanted to come but she stayed, having heard rumor that Roan was at the capital and would be able to look after me while she kept Azgeda in tact as much as possible."

Ontari took a deep breath, pressing on, "To be honest, I was terrified the whole time I was there.  I had always been told by Nia that if my Nightblood was discovered the Commander would kill me and despite Roan insisting she wouldn't, I feared it.  When Nia died it was both the best and most terrifying moment of my life.  But Roan became King and I knew from the moment he caught my eye that it would be alright.  Lexa had found out but hadn't acted on it and I assumed that meant I was safe, at least for now.  I returned to Azgeda with Roan." Ontari paused, frowning slightly.

"When we arrived back Echo didn't stay long, just long enough to know that the Clan wouldn't erupt into chaos before she disappeared.  I was worried but I knew she could take care of herself and I knew that whatever she was doing had to be important - at least to her.  And I knew she deserved happiness.  Roan brought me to the tournament as his champion and it went well, I ended up being allowed to stay in Polis." Ontari smiled.

"I couldn't believe it when Bellamy brought her in with him to the meeting.    I suddenly understood why she'd left.  After she returned from the Mountain she would talk about a Skai boy with enough bravery to match all of Azgeda's warriors and smart as anyone she'd met yet still somehow foolish as a child.  I finally understood why she talked about him like she did and why she left.  And, as much as I missed her, I couldn't have been happier that she had finally found someone to make her happy."

Ontari chuckled, "I think that's it."

I nodded, "Yeah.  Mochof Ontari (Thank you Ontari).  For trusting me."

She smiled, nodding, "Pro Okteivia (You're welcome Octavia)."

(Alright, for anyone wondering about Costia.  Yes, I know Ontari would have been around for it.  However Octavia doesn't know about Costia and Ontari would have no reason to tell her about it.  That may be covered in a later conversation between Ontari and someone.)