Percy Jackson and the Triwizard Tournament (Goblet of Fire)

Chapter 18: Oh Schist, it's Skeeter

Percy was so deep in thought he had forgotten to stop stirring his cauldron in a counter-clockwise motion. The wooden spatula (Hey, it's all he could find. He decided to wing it... It was that or stirring the Draught of Living Death with his bare hands.) began to make an unnatural sizzling noise.

"Huh, that's new..." Percy mumbled curiously, as he began to lift the spatula up in the air. But before he could, there was a small 'plop' and the entire end of his stirring utensil fell back inside his cauldron. All he was holding was a bare wooden stick with its tip scorched down to a sharpened point (still smoking from the end).

Now Percy knows what your all thinking, why would sweet *note sarcasm* Professor Snape assign this poor boy such an advanced task? Well, that brings him back to the beginning of the lesson...

Annabeth and Thalia had already been seated as he stepped through the stone threshold and into the classroom. Thalia waved for him to come over and sit between the two. 

He began walking towards them, carrying his school book tucked under his arm (Dumbledore has been kind enough to inform the teachers that they lacked the required books, and allowed them to borrow from the classrooms) until his foot got caught against Neville's robe. He stumbled few steps forward before waving his arms, which Thalia later described as 'a not-very-graceful duck trying to fly.' His book flew into the air before he toppled face first onto the floor, dragging poor Neville down with him.

"Oh, SCHIST!" he shouted, before bracing his precious face from the floor. Snape raised an eyebrow, obvious caught off guard by his choice of words.

Neville (luckily) was not severely injured. Because he was dragged down a split-second later than Percy, Neville had the convenience of a nice particular-demigod-savior-or-Olympus-cushion. He muttered his apologies before stumbling back towards his seat.

Percy quickly pushed himself off the ground, his hand cupped under his nose at the sense of blood. He then sulked over towards his friends.

Thalia couldn't stop laughing, "Your - your face was PRICELESS! Oh my gods!" before she rolled over laughing and slipped off her bench too. 

Annabeth quickly snapped Percy's nose in place with a flick of her wand as she cried out, "Episkey!"

"Oh schist!" Thalia shouted, her fingers desperately trying to get a grasp on the edge of the wooden bench, but didn't succeed. Snape raised an eyebrow again, this time, turning around to face them with a piece of chalk in hand.

"Silence." his monotone voice rung through the classroom, as the two demigods took their seats. He seemed satisfied, and began to face the chalkboard once again.

'SCREEEEEEECH' Percy and the majority of sensible people cupped their hands over their ears. Snape's chalk made a sharp, piercing noise as he began to write in his sloppy cursive. He completed the motion of a large, loopy 'A' before he swiftly moved his wrist to begin writing the second letter.

'SCREEECH' a few Gryffindors began to groan, including Harry as Snape finished writing 'n'

'SCREEEEEEEEEEECH' If looks could kill... Snape would've dropped dead, courtesies from Thalia. A third letter was quickly visible on the board with one last subtle 'SCREECH' as he dashed the 't.'

He began once more, 'SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-'

"Holy schist, I can't take it anymore!" Percy exclaimed as he rose up from his seat, "Mr. Snapple, you have a serious problem with the chalk you've got there. What is it made of, metal?"

Harry snickered, along with the rest of the Gryffindors. Snape sent them a deadly glare before Parvati muttered, 'Snapple' and caused another chain of uncontrollable giggles.