Ohana

"Parker likes you."

"Can we go school shopping today?" Declan asks me as I set a plate of pancakes in front of Micah.

"I don't know. Daddy usually likes to go too."

"But Dad's at work." Luca says.

"Exactly." I say.

"Can we go anyways?" Micah asks, coating his stack of pancakes in an inch of syrup.

God, that's so much sugar.

"No." I decide. "No, maybe we will go this weekend."

"I heard Daddy yelling about divorce last night." My eight year old says matter-of-factly. "When me and my brothers googled it, it said divorce is the legal dissolution of a marriage my a court of other competent body."

How the hell does an eight year old know that?

"Declan said he thinks it means it's when two married people break up." She stuffs her mouth with pancakes, chews, swallows, and then downs it with her chocolate milk. "You and Daddy are married, right?"

"Yes." I say, narrowing my eyes.

"So you're getting divorced?" Luca questions.

"No." I say.

"Well Daddy said he was going to divorce you."

"He's not at work, is he?" Micah asks.

"Yes he is." I say.

"No, he's getting divorced, right? Is that what he's doing? Don't they need papers? My friend's parents got divorced, and he said his Mum has to file for it. To get what? Papers?" My twelve year old raises his eyebrows.

"We're not getting divorced." I say.

"Mum, do you promise?" Luca asks.

"I promise." I say. "Daddy's working. He's not filing for divorce. Stop poisoning your minds with what you read on the internet."

"But divorce is when two married people break up, right Mummy?" Eloise beers at me with her big blue eyes.

"Yes." I say.

"If you're not getting divorced, why did Dad bring it up?" Micah questions.

I don't even want to think about last night, let alone have my kids question me about it. I throw my hands up.

"I don't know, alright? We're not getting divorced, now eat your breakfast."

I walk into the kitchen and grab my mug from the cabinet, pouring coffee into it.

Today is going to be a long day.

"So we can't go school shopping?" Declan asks.

I sigh.

"No, we're not going school shopping." I respond, putting creamer in my coffee.

"So what can we do today? Can you call Aunt Natalie? Maybe Caroline can hang out." Micah says.

I study him.

Caroline is just a couple months younger than him. They've been friends since they were in diapers when we ran into Natalie and Will on the beach.

"Do you have a crush on Caroline?" I ask my nine year old.

"No." He says.

"Yes you do." I say when his neck turns pink. I move around the table so I can see his face.

"No I don't." He says.

"Yes you do, Micah." I say. "Don't lie to me. Do you, or do you not, have a crush on Caroline?"