Unbearable Weight of Leaves

Secret

Author's Note

Decided to have this short and sweet Naruto chapter here. Considering she is still bed-bound there isn't a whole lot going on with her at the moment, so just sticking to the important bits. Next up- Gaara's version at wooing a girl.

Comments/reviews always serve to inspire, and thank you for all of them so far. Each one makes my day :D

Naruto

I stared at the ceiling, unable to wipe the stupid grin from my face. Kisarei. So, this would be my official name, the name my own husband had given to me. If I managed to live, this is the name Suna and the world would know me by. "Kisarei." I said it aloud, wanting to hear it, wanting to get used to it. I could live, couldn't I? Maybe. If I did, then I would need to get used to this name. "Hi, I am Kisarei, wife of the fifth Kazekage." I snorted as I said it. The words sounded so damned formal. The lead position in Konoha was nothing like it was here. Here, the Kazekage was an inherited position full of ceremony and traditions. Formal and precise, a figurehead of the people, but with enough power to fight and defend for their people if it came down to it. In my studies, I noticed Gaara's... my father in law had worked at making it closer to the other villages, connect with the people, make it less formal. He had built a house, a small one, amongst his people, married a common ninja and walked the streets without airs.

When Gaara took over though, he brought it back. I asked him about it, when I had first come across the comparison. All he told me was 'etiquette is something good to focus upon'. I smiled as I remembered the naming ceremony. Did all Suna citizens have to go through such a thing? What a beautiful tradition. Not just a scribble on a paper, or a utterance of a name for others to carry on in place of a parent. My smile fell at this thought and my vision blurred. I raised my arm up to my eyes, hiding my tears. There was nobody else around, but it was habit. Breathe deep, laugh it off, everything was fine. The sting in my eyes lessened and I lowered my arm.

I screamed. "What the fucking hell?" I glared at the hooded intruder who had startled me. "I close my eyes for a god damned minute and you sneak in like some kind of pervert, the hell?"

He visibly cringed at the word, and refused to meet my eyes. "Hey, you holding up ok." A deep redness formed on his cheeks, so deep it was visible from the shadows of his hood and I watched as his hands moved as though they were moving puppet strings.

I narrowed my eyes at him. "You hiding something from me?" I sat up as much as I could force myself to. "You are being obvious about it."

"What? I'm not, I mean, why would I..." He groaned and walked up to me. "Listen here, I'm only here to make sure you are fucking alright, so are you?"

"Oh yeah, wonderful." I rolled my eyes at him. I can barely move, I am a fucking girl, my name was just legally changed and I could totally die giving birth to your niece. "Ask me again in two months and I will give you a less sarcastic answer." Because if he could ask me in two months, it would have meant I lived. No matter my real condition at the point he asked, I would consider it a win.

He sighed and pulled a chair up to my bed. He kept his eyes trained on the floor, his shoulders slumped to the point of being barely noticeable. "You know, he will never let you die. He would sooner do a full human sacrifice of all of Suna before letting you go. So you can just stop with all the death talk, alright?"

"He might not have a choice in it. My body's been tearing itself apart since the first day, slowly at first. When I went to Temari's, I ran out of the sedative. That shit let me move though, without it I was just bound to the fucking bed. Couldn't even blink my damned eyes without wanting to just end myself it hurt so fucking bad." I spread my hand out over my daughter. The skin was getting tighter there. Soon, she would be out in the world, taking her first breaths of air. Seeing light and hearing sound. She would be so overwhelmed by it all she would cry, and maybe, just maybe I could hold her, comfort her.