Just This Once (COMPLETED)

Kabanata 51

#JustThisOnce

Kabanata 51

I didn't know what happened after Maven pulled me away with him. All I knew was that he looked so pissed. And after years of living with Maven, alam ko na hindi siya iyong tipo ng tao na mabilis mainis. He'd always been in control of his emotions. He valued logic more than emotion.

And seeing him like this was throwing me off.

"Maven," I called his name the moment we arrived home. He didn't stop. Diretso siyang naglakad hanggang sa makarating kami sa kusina. He got himself a glass of water and downed it all.

"One question," he said. I remained quiet. "Do you really want to leave this place?"

I knew the answer. It was a yes. I wanted to leave this place. Alam ko na kahit kailan, hindi ako magkakaroon ng katahimikan sa lugar na 'to. This place would constantly remind me of all the bad things... and even the good things made my heart clench. It would be best for everyone if I just leave.

"Think about it, Genesis. If after the wedding and you still want to leave, we'll leave."

"Your parents won't—"

He cut me off. "You know I never followed them. This is about you. This has always been about your choice. You begged me to marry you, remember?"

I clenched my jaw. "You know I had no choice."

"But now you have. Don't waste it this time."

I nodded. "Okay," I said.

"And when you make a choice, be sure. I don't like certainties, Genesis. You're the biggest uncertainty of my life. Stop that. I don't like it anymore."

My lips parted. "W-what?"

Maven clenched his hand around the glass and stared at me with his cold eyes. "You know how people tend to want the things they know they can never have? That's you for me."

"A-ano?" ulit ko.

"You're like a fucking forbidden fruit. I don't want to want you, but you keep on tempting me with your fucking tears. You make me want to be a fucking knight in shining armor and save you. Don't do that. Stop that. I don't want to love you. I can't love you. You're in love with someone else."

"Maven—"

"I can't, okay? I can't love you. I can't deal with another lost."

Mabilis niya akong tinalikuran at nagsimulang maglakad paalis. Hindi ko alam ang gagawin ko. Hindi ko alam na ganito 'yung nararamdaman niya.

Akala ko...

Akala ko alam niya.

* * *

Kinabukasan, nakita ko si Maven. He acted like everything's normal. Like he didn't just tell me that he had feelings for me.

"Don't stare," he said while I was watching him put toast on his plate.

"I'm sorry," I quickly said.

"And stop being sorry. Just continue being snarky like you always are," he casually said and then sipped his coffee. "It reminds me that I can't live with a nagger like you."

I didn't know why he was acting this way, but the more he acted normal, the more he's making things harder for me. He kept on mentioning annulment, but with the way things were going, hindi ko na alam kung ano ang gagawin ko.

Would I run away with him and leave everything behind? But Maven said he didn't want to love me... but running away with him would maybe give him hope. Ewan ko. Hindi ko na talaga alam.