It ain't me. // Phillip "Lip" Gallagher// Shameless US

The trouble with old habits

My eyes crack open and I see Lip asleep beside me across a couple of seats. I slowly hop up and grab my wallet and decided to grab coffees.

As I'm walking back towards Lip he is now sitting up and is awake.

"Thanks." He says,

"Enjoy it, it was $5 dollars." I smile at him.

"Since when can you afford $5 coffees?"

"I've got some savings, worked a few jobs with a friend for a couple of months."

A nurse walks out of Liam's room and Lip and I both jump up.

"Is he okay?" Lips says.

"He's been having seizures, hallucinations, elevated heart rate, there's a chance of intellectual damage but, put it this way, you're little brother is strong, he's a fighter. My money would be put on a full recovery." The lady says.

"Can we see him?" I say, as Lip is still taking in all the information.

She nods, "he's a bit out of it still but yes."

I nod as she walks away.

I take Lip's hand in mine and our fingers interlock as I pull him closer to the room.

"Hey lil man." Lip says, touching Liam's arm.

"It's gonna be okay, Lip." I say.

He nods, "thank you, I don't know if i could of done this without you."

Lip and I sit in Liam's room for about another hour before the doctors take him for more scans and we're waiting outside now.

"Want another coffee? Food?" I say to Lip,

"Uh, a sandwich, if you can?" He says, "please."

"Look at you, Gallagher. All the manners." I smiled as I walked towards the cafeteria.

I grabbed a few different sandwiches, a few different bottles of drinks and other snacks and head back towards Lip.

I turn the corner and I hear the others. Debbie, Carl, Vee and Kev.

Lip looks up at me and smiles. Debbie turns around first and runs towards me, embracing me in a warm hug.

Next is Carl and the Vee and Kev run toward me.

"You're back!" Debbie says.

Carl speaks next, "how long are you back for?"

Kev looks at me and kisses my forehead and Vee kisses my cheek.

"I don't know kiddo." I say as we walk back towards Lip and sit down.

"Anyone hungry?" I say smiling.

I had Lip a sandwich and hand Debbie and Carl bags of chips that I bought.

...

It's the next day and Liam is wheeled out in a wheelchair. Lip and I instantly run towards him and he grins as we hug him.

We walk downstairs and Lip heads towards the L.

"Oi, Gallagher." I say and he stops and turns to face me with Liam in his arms. "Get in the car." I say, opening the door to the taxi.

He smiles at me, "how can you afford a $40 can ride, Cave?"

"Don't worry, just get in."

...
Its a quite the little trip but we finally arrive home and everyone but Fiona, because she's waiting for her court date, is there to greet us.

After some food and catching up with everyone, Lip and I are sitting outside, he's drunk and smoking and I'm sober, for once.

"Hey, um, is it okay if I crash? Take the couch or something?"

Lip nods, "take Fiona's bed." He smiles, before burping and giggling.

"Let's get you to bed, Gallagher." I smile before helping him up.

I help him up the stairs and help him hop into bed.

"Goodnight Lip." I say and he rubs my head.

"Night Char. Thank you, for everything." He says.

...

A few hours pass and I'm tossing and turning in bed. I'm not comfortable in the shirt I'm wearing so I strip to my bra and underwear which conveniently are matching.

I decided to have a joint so it can hopefully help me get some sleep.

I'm sitting on the window sill when the door cracks open, it's Lip.

"Can't sleep?" He says.

I shake my head.

"Same." He says, walking towards me. He's only in his boxers. He is sober now.

I pass him the spliff and he takes a few puffs.

"I've missed you." He says,

I nod, "I miss you too." I say as I take the joint back from him.

We finish it and we sit quietly for a few minutes.

"Is it okay if I sleep in here with you?" He says,

"I, uh," I want to say yes but I think of how Mandy would feel about it.

"I just don't want to be alone." He says.

"What about Mandy?" I say,

"She's away with her brothers." He says as I crawl into bed and he knows he's gonna join me.

He joins me after pausing for a few seconds and our skin to skin contact is nice.

"I'm sorry I'm such a fuck up." He says, softly.

I turn around to face him and our noses are almost touching as I begin speaking.

"Lip," I say, as I place my hand on his cheek, "you're not. You're a good person; you're smart and you're good looking and you're kind hearted."

He half smiles at me and before I know it we're kissing and my body is ontop of his.

It's getting really intense, real quickly and before I know it, we're fucking but it's not like any time before, it's slow and sensual and effortless.

He stops for a minute and looks at me.

"I love you." He says,

I nod. "I know." I say, "I love you too."

And with that we continue the deed we've begun. And with that I feel like I am as bad as Karen Jackson.

But it's worth it, Phillip Gallagher has been the boy I've loved for years now. I'm thinking we could make forever after all.