It ain't me. // Phillip "Lip" Gallagher// Shameless US

11 months of ignorance

"Hey, it's me. I, uh, I'm sorry. I really am sorry, Char. I miss you, I miss everything about you. I fucked up, I did and I uh, I should go."

Phillip Gallagher had just left the 147th voice message on my phone.

It had only been 2 months at this point. I would get messages daily and nightly.

"Char," his words slurred, "please. Forgive me. I need you." He was obviously drunk. "We miss you. Everybody misses you." He sniffled, "I'm going to college now." He laughs, "well, kind of, I'm a TA for some drunk, hes alright." He says, "I really just want to hear your voice, Char."

Another two months pass and then I receive another voice message.

"Fuck you, Charlotte. You could atleast let me know you're okay, atleast let the rest of us know you're okay. It's been almost fucking 5 months and nothing. I miss you. But fuck you." He says, he's drunk again. "This is the last fucking message Char. Fuck you, I hope you're happy."

But he left one last call, after that one.

"Who's gonna walk you through the dark side of the morning? Who's gonna rock you when the sun won't let you sleep? Who's waking up to drive you home when you're drunk and all alone char? Tell me that cause it ain't me. For fucks sake, you could atleast fucking reply. This is it, isn't it? Fuck you."

Andy with that, 11 months had passed.

I had dropped out of college months ago, I moved in with a rich girl, who had became my partner in crime, Leah.

I have to admit, we were off the rails. Constantly partying, constantly doing drugs, drunk every night, trashing our hotel room and getting another.

Leah and I were in our suite with a handful of other people who I had no idea who they were.

I was in a high waisted short skirt and my bra and a bunch of us were doing lines off of the coffee table.

Leah's boyfriend, for the night, Ryan, handed me my phone as I finished my line.

"Kev" lit up the screen.

"Hey, hello?" I say, worried, it's almost 1am.

"Char, please, you have to come home. It's Liam. He's in hospital."

"I, uh, ofcourse. I'll be there soon." He hung up the phone.

I'm packing a bag with a couple of my things and I still have money from working with Leah from the summer, enough to let me comfortably live for about a month.

Within an hour I'm in an uber on the way to the airport.

I'm still buzzed like nothing else and I haven't slept in about two days now. If not more.

...

As I land in Chicago, I get in the first taxi to the hospital, not knowing where else to go.

Kev and Vee would be asleep by now and I wasn't sure if I wasn't welcome in the Gallaghers anymore. I'm sure I was but, I couldn't risk the rejection.

Sure I felt sober by now but I definitely wasn't.

I slowly approached the lady at the desk and she softly smiled at me, the clock her read 4:45am.

"uh. Gallagher, Liam." I say.

"Are you immediate family, sweets?"

"Uh, yes, sister." I smile.