One Big Mistake

Ch- 47 Some Kind of News

I calmly stood up from the couch but discretely put my hand over my mouth so I wouldn't raise any suspicion from Cole. I walked to the hallway and when I was out of his sight I ran to the bathroom and threw up in the toilet.

It'd been a week and a half since my mom told me that she thought I was pregnant and I still haven't taken a pregnancy test because of how scared I am. I can't stand the smell of coffee and it is horrible because coffee smells are all around.  Every morning when I wake up and smell the coffee I get so sick to my stomach and sometimes I throw up.

Not to mention my period was supposed to start a few days ago. I also cried myself to sleep last night because Cole told me that I looked tired.

When Cole gets home from Whitney's appointment I'm going to go buy a pregnancy test at the gas station.

In the meantime I played with the boys and asked them if they wanted a little brother or sister. Josiah puked about ten seconds later so I think he's fine with just his brother.

I still haven't even brought it up to Hannah or Cole because I want to be sure.

Cole pulled in the driveway and I rushed outside with my keys and my wallet and told him I'd be right back. He looked kind of mad but I didn't have time to converse in that moment. I drove to the gas station and bought a few pregnancy tests. It was less painful than the first time when the cashier was mean.

When I got home I rushed in the bathroom and took the tests. I went out of the bathroom during the time and Cole looked stress.

"What's wrong?" I asked while stressing out myself.

"I mean, nothing I guess," he said and looked at me. "Whitney's baby is not mine and she knew the whole time. She just knew the other guy wouldn't stick around so she played me. She finally confessed though," he ranted angrily.

"Really? That's awesome!" I told him and he nodded.

"You're right. I should probably be happier. I'm just so mad I wasted several months trying to be a good guy," he complained.

"Hold that thought," I said and rushed into the bathroom, reading the sticks.

I immediately started crying. How did this happen? We were careful. I put my hand on my mouth trying to stop myself from sobbing.

"Jessa, are you okay?" Cole asked on the other side of the door and I couldn't hold back the tears. I just started bawling. Cole entered slowly and was confused at my state. I held up the pregnancy test and his face hardened and he didn't say anything. "How did this fucking happen? This is bullshit," he was unaccepting and slammed his fist against the bathroom wall.

"We can't have another baby," I cried into my arm. We are barely making it now. As is I have a breakdown at least once a week because of how demanding taking care of two babies is.

"You have to get rid of this baby. I'm serious this time. We don't need this," he looked me in the eyes and I shook my head slowly. I could tell how serious he was by his expression.

"Cole we can't kill it," I told him and wiped under my eyes.

"Jessa," he said as he paced the small bathroom and then sat down on the tub beside me. "I cannot do this," he emphasized.

"I know. Me neither," I mumbled and put my face in my hands.

"No. I can't do this," he repeated again very seriously.