Omerta- Book I (Winner of the 2015 People's Choice Award)

Chapter 56: Praying

*struts onto stage wearing revealing Lady Gaga outfit*

MOTHER IS BACK, KEETIES. 

THE NOTE I WROTE AT THE BOTTOM OF THIS CHAPTER IS SO FETCH.

Twitter/Instagram/Snapchat: katrocks247

* * *

He couldn't tell me what was going on.

At least, that's what I assumed. I couldn't bring myself to ask him where his brother was being kept, or what Fico planned on doing with him. He could have been dead already, for all I knew. What I did know for sure was that Ferro was being torn apart inside. He was devastated by the betrayal of his own brother, and his behavior was mimicking grieving. When we reunited again at the estate, after the incident with Vincent, he was more distant than ever before.

"I'll be back tomorrow," Ferro had told me and cradled my face. "Be good for me, tigrotta mia." His words were empty of emotion and so were his eyes. But he'd left me with a tender kiss that still lingered on my lips.

Ferro had nobody to confide in about his brother. That much was clear by his behavior. I, on the other hand, had Samantha to express the aftermath of being held captive by Vincent, and my worrisome thoughts about Ferro and I. I knew she would never repeat anything I said to Fico, and she understood what I was going through. She too had been through hell and back with Fico.

"The men here are all same," she told me, and popped open our second bag of Doritos. "Half robot, I mean. They have to shut off their emotions sometimes because that's what they have to do to survive. To get over the shit they see. Fico and Ferro have seen more horrors in their lifetime than any other person could take. Ferro will come around again. I know he will."

"How do you do it?" I asked.

Sam frowned. "Do what? Tolerate Fico? When he starts to get mean, I just tranquilize him, or stick things up his butt."

"I meant," I laughed out, "how do you...handle this. Handle the mafia." The conversation grew more serious and Sam gave me a somber look. "Am I the only one who has a million doubts about Ferro and I?" I wiped my hand over my face. "I don't know if I can be in a relationship with a man who maybe, one day, won't make it back home to me. Who kills people for a living?" Sam didn't say anything in response, as if she knew there was more rattling around in my brain. "But... he needs me right now. And I need him right now. And I love him. It scares me how much I love him."

"You're everywhere," Sam said.

"Thanks," I said dryly.

"And I wouldn't want it any other way," Sam said lightly, putting her hand on my shoulder. "Of course you're going to have those kinds of thoughts, Scarlett. If you weren't having doubts about Ferro and you, then I'd be seriously concerned. Everybody has doubts in a relationship. It's about focusing on what makes you two similar and what makes you happy that will eventually help you overcome those doubts."

"But what if...what I can't overcome my doubts?"

Sam stared at me. "Then you have to leave him," she said simply. "It'll be, without a doubt, the hardest thing you'll ever do. Sometimes, when you're having doubts, you just have to walk away from what's the cause of them. But most of the time, what you need is a pinch in the fucking arm."

She pinched me.

"Ow!" I shouted.

"And I'll do that again if I ever hear you say doubt to me again," Sam continued brutally, as I rubbed my arm, "People like you and I, aka females, convince ourselves to do stupid things that aren't really good for us. Men like Fico and Ferro are designed to do what they do. Women like us, who are strong enough to love someone so deeply damaged, are destined to be by their side. You wouldn't be here right now if you weren't strong enough to be with Ferro. And if you run, you'll find your way back to him. It's that. Simple. You're loved by a man whose soul is much darker than yours. Oh, well. No one ever promised you an angel, Scarlett Clemente."