Secrets of the Heart

Chapter 18

One Week Later

I have confined myself to my room for the past week, only letting in my personal maid and butler, knowing that their allegiance is to me and not to my parents. They've brought me food and water, and cleaned up for me.

Mother, Pier, and even Father have been banging on my door at all hours of the day, but I've told them that I feel ill and think that it's contagious. Of course, they know I'm lying, but I would never admit to it.

Luckily, my bedchambers are very large, and have many other rooms attached. I have more of a wing of the castle than a bedroom.

I've kept myself busy knitting, writing poems, practicing my piano,and even trying on my dresses and strutting across my room as if I were a prima doña in an opera house. But more than anything, I've been thinking.

Thinking about the wedding that's date is in just three days. Thinking of Pier and how he betrayed me. Thinking of how I'm going to get out of it. Thinking of Leonardo.

A knock sounds at my door, and I groan.

"For the last time, I'm sick and wish to be alone," I shout, throwing a book at the door.

"Clarabelle, it's me. Alice."

I sigh, and walk to the door.

"Well what do you want?"

"To talk to you. I think that I know what you're thinking and I need to talk to you before you make any decisions."

I hesitantly open the door, and usher her in. Once she's inside, I quickly shut the door, being sure to lock it.

"Sit," I say, gesturing to a chair in the tea nook of my chambers. She does, and smoothes her dress out around her.

"What are you doing," she asks.

"Sitting," I respond, rolling my eyes.

"Seriously Clarabelle- what are you doing? Not talking to Pier, locking yourself in your room for a week? Everything your parents have worked for is being thrown away!"

"It's not that simple Alice! You believe that everything is either black or white, right or wrong," I cry, standing to my feet. "But it isn't Alice. Sometimes things aren't black or white at all, but a mix of the two. And you have to weigh the good against the bad."

My back is to her now, as I stare out the window. I fall silent for a moment, deep in thought. My eyes are fixed on the barn, which is close enough to be visible, but far enough away to seem small from my point of view. I can almost make out a person, lunging a white horse. It could very well be Leonardo working with Snowflower.

"Alice, I can't do it," I whisper, tears falling down my face. "I can't marry him. But I- I don't know how not to. It-It's what's been planed for me since I was just a baby. How can I marry him when I'll be miserable? How can I not?"

She's at my side in a second, and she grabs my hand. She follows my gaze to the barn, and sighs.

"You're right. I should have listened to you from the start. We'll figure this out, I swear it," she fiercely states, pulling me into a hug.

I wrap my arms around her tightly, and let my tears fall freely.

After what seems like an eternity of hopeless tears, we break apart.

"I have to leave now, but I'll be back tomorrow. I think I have a plan, but I need to talk to some people first," she mutters, running her fingers through her hair.

"No! Don't tell anyone Alice, or else I swear-," I order.

"I promise it's only two people, and trust me, they would never tell a soul," she promises. I sigh, and nod my approval.

"Alice, would you mind asking my butler to bring up a light vegetable soup? I don't feel well, and that's what mother always had made for me when I was ill," I request.

"Of course," she accedes, before leaving my room. I quickly lock the door behind her, and go to sit at my piano.

I play a few notes from a song I learned long ago, and quietly let the first few lyrics slip out of my mouth.

'Look with your heart

And not with your eyes

The heart can't be fooled

The heart is too wise

Forget what you think

Ignore what you hear

Look with your heart

It always sees clear'

I have forgotten the rest of the song, but the message is still the same. Never in my life have the lyrics rang truer.

A/N

The lyrics belong to Andrew Lloyd Webber and come from the play 'Love Never Dies', the sequel to 'Phantom of the Opera.'

Little known fact- I am an extreme POTO buff, and know all of the songs by heart. I sing them around the house, although I don't sing them very well.

What did you think of the chapter? What do you think Alice is up to? How do you think Leonardo will respond when he finds out? What will happen at the wedding? Or will there even be a wedding?