Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
••••••••••
[ hey guys. just a quickie little author note: BUCKY IS NOT THE FATHER. NEITHER IS WIN. this is said multiple times. it was funny at first, but now it's annoying, so please stop 'speculating.' thank you. 7/10/23: will also add that cynthia did not get pregnant non-consensually. she just wants to keep jamie's father secret from hydra ]
DECEMBER 4TH, 1983
THE BABY BOYCynthiacradled in her arms giggled as she tickled his stomach.
James Edward Hayes. His middle name came from her grandfather on her father's side, and James came from Bucky. From looking and hacking different computers, she was able to find HYDRA's files on him.
He was born in the 20s (she assumed, as HYDRA hadn't listed his birth year for her to see), and he had been lifelong friends with the man behind Captain America—Steve Rogers—Until his apparent death in the 40s, during World War II. But Cynthia wasn't sure if she wanted to tell Bucky she named her baby after him.
James came kicking into the world on April 8th, 1983, born as healthy as a little baby could be. And, strangely enough, when Cynthia held him in her arms for the first time, the world had stopped—had changed, now that she had this strange, little, miracle-worker in her life.
She hadn't heard from Bucky or Win since their last get together in March of the previous year. And with Christmas arriving, and taking care of herself and her baby, Cynthia hadn't thought all that much about him. Sure, here and there, but she was very focused on Jamie. Taking care of him, raising him.
"A dream is a wish you heart makes," Cynthia sang quietly to Jamie, who gurgled and held his foot in his hand, bringing it towards his mouth. "When, you're fast asleep. In dreams, you will lose your heartaches. Whatever you wish for, you keep."
Putting Jamie in his high chair, and going over to the kitchen, where Jamie was sitting at an angle he could directly see her, Cynthia got out some baby food from fridge, and continued singing, until she was interrupted by a knock on the door.
"Be right back, baby," Clara said, kissing Jamie on the head before going over to the door. Slowly opening it, Cynthia looked out into the hallway. "What are you-what are you doing here?" Cynthia stumbled over her words. "Who are you?"
"Um . . . I'm Bucky," Bucky replied, carefully holding his mask in his hands.
"Come in," Cynthia said, opening the door wider for him to walk through. She hadn't yet told him about the device she had put above the door.
When Bucky walked into the living room, his metal arm hung slack at his side, and his head whipped over, and he quietly said, "What-" Before his arm sprung back up, beeping for a few seconds before Bucky realized what had happened.
"You can't use it as a weapon," Cynthia quietly answered, "Not—not right now."
Before Bucky could question her again, a baby's cry made her head whip around, and she called, "Coming!"
Bucky froze as she ran off towards the kitchen. He heard her quietly singing, giggling as he heard gurgling come from a baby. His metal arm now working as a normal arm, he took off all his guns and set them on the large bookshelf that had now replaced the smaller one, and took off towards the kitchen. When he spotted the baby boy sitting in a high chair, Cynthia sitting next to him, Bucky asked, "What's his name?"
"Jamie," Cynthia replied. "He was born back in April."
Bucky couldn't stop looking at the small child. His blue eyes definitely stood out against his tanned skin, and dark hair, and Bucky asked, "Who's the father?"
Cynthia froze, the spoon holding Jamie's food stuck in the air. "I—I don't want to talk about it," Cynthia said after a few moments of silence. "He's . . . No one." She continued feeding him until she smiled at him and said, "Time for bed!"
Bucky couldn't remember the last time he had been around a baby. Christmas music played quietly as Bucky sat on the couch, silently listening to Cynthia sing Jamie to sleep. He wondered what his full birth name was, where she got the ideas for it. If he even had the last name Hayes. Everything was so relaxed here. Cynthia was very overprotective of Jamie, as mothers should be.
Once Jamie had fallen asleep, Cynthia came out to the living room to find Bucky reading one of her favorite books—Alice in Wonderland. "Are you upset at me?" Cynthia asked quietly as she studied Bucky.
Closing the book carefully, Bucky said, "Why would I be upset?"
"Because I won't be able to work with you for who knows how long," Cynthia replied, coming over and sitting on the couch next to him. "I . . . I can't do that anymore."
"But does that mean you won't want to see me anymore?" Bucky asked, looking over at her.
"God, of course not. It sounds bad, but I was going to raise Jamie around David as if he was his grandfather."
At that, Bucky raised his eyebrows, and Cynthia continued to explain. "My real father, the one who had died in 1979 . . . He was not someone I would want to raise my own children around. David . . ." She paused. "He could possibly fill in the role if I asked him too."
Bucky nodded, understanding. Cynthia took this chance. Was she seriously letting herself fall in love with Bucky? She was so hesitant to catch feelings for him, especially since he was so involved HYDRA—he was owned by them currently, and Cynthia wasn't sure if she wanted to believe he'd ever get free.
"Because HYDRA knows where you live . . . Would you ever want to move?" Bucky asked, and Cynthia thought about it before nodding in response. "New York is dangerous . . . If I were to move, I don't know where I would go." Cynthia shook her head thinking about what would happen if she got caught.
Cynthia got up from the couch suddenly, and walked over to her small VHS collection sitting on one of her shelves. "You know, now that I've had Jamie, I've actually had to start getting movies. Kids movies, of course, but movies. And . . . I had never realized it until I had sat down and watched one late at night that it was my first time watching a movie with sound."
"Do . . . You want to put one on?" Bucky asked quietly behind her. Cynthia smiled, and replied, "Peter Pan is my favorite, so maybe you'll like it too."
↠↠↠↠↠
The quiet sound of the TV playing Peter Pan was enough for Cynthia to fall asleep too.
After she had fallen asleep, Bucky went to sleep in her bed. He wanted to be near Jamie. He had wanted to try and be kinder when he was away from HYDRA, so . . . Maybe this was his chance to be.
The apartment was silent until the cry of a baby woke both Cynthia and Bucky.
Cynthia, following her motherly instinct, ran through the kitchen and towards the bedroom. But when she arrived, she stopped in the doorway, and hid behind it partially.
Across from her, Bucky sat on the bed, holding Jamie close to his chest. He was shushing him quietly and gently rocking Jamie.
And that, was when Cynthia realized she loved Bucky.
