My Psycho Jock (bxb)

Chapter 25 If I Can't Have You, Then Don't Live

"An obsession is a way for damage people to damage themselves more."

     

      Staring into the air is somewhat a very relaxing thing to do. Because at that moment, your mind is practically empty and your breathing, slow. Its like the world is moving on without you but still you could only care less. Because at that moment, life is not so bad for the very first time.

     Nowadays it seems that staring is the only thing that Edward Dawson could do. He would take his place on the sofa in front of the fireplace and stared and stared and stared again.

     What he thinks about? He had no idea. Escaping? Maybe, but we all know those are nothing but a definite reason for him to put his life in danger again. But still, its true, he wanted to escape from this treacherous hole that had him lock, that had him hated his mother for bringing him into this dent and rotten world.

Need he say more?

       Everyday Benjamin would come home to him and talk and make love to him like its brunch on a Saturday morning, like flowers blooming at night. Every fucking single day the same thing happen.

     There wasn't anything to do besides sex. Edward didn't believe one thing about that whole love bullshit. He had Benjamin thinking that he loves him but god knows its not the truth.

This is the truth.

      He despised Benjamin. He hated him with his entire living cells and system that is known to this world. He planed for Benjamin's death every single day until the image of it played in his head again and again and again like a broken record.

    But still, no matter how much hatred he has for Ben, the only person who should die around here is him and he wanted that. To die.

     Suddenly the front door make a sound and Eddie turn his head in hope to catch a glimpse of the outside world for the very first time he had been taken. But hope is hope, the only thing that we believe is real.

      When he turn around, the door was already closed and there stood Benjamin with a bouquet of roses in his hand and a six pack beer in the others.

"Hey baby. I bought you flowers." Benjamin walk towards Eddie and plopped down beside him as he put the flowers on Eddie's lap and the beer on the table beside.

     Edward look at the flower with no interest and only caressed the tip of one of the roses.

"Pretty." Eddie said.

"I knew you liked it." Benjamin spread his right arm so that it would rest behind Eddie's neck.

"What's the special occasion?" 

Eddie look at the flowers and pick them up to smell.

"We graduated today."

"We?"

"Yeah. You and me. Well...even
though you can't be at the graduation ceremony I thought I buy you some flowers for...you know, make yourself feel like you don't have to go to school anymore."

       Eddie blink his eyes a few time to stop the tears from flowing down. But it was too hard. His heart clenched and the pain in his lungs cause difficulties for his labored breathing. Graduation. He would've known how that feels if his life was define in a different ways.

"Eddie, what's wrong?" Benjamin scooted closer to Eddie and held both of his hand as he brings them to his chest.

"I'm just...happy...I guess." Eddie were sobbing and shaken as he cries his heart out.

     Benjamin eyes enlighten from the sparks of happiness but not because they both, as if, had graduated.

     It is because he had always love watching Eddie's cry. They look so beautifully damage to him. The tears that drop down on his pink pale cheeks brings uplifting beautiful memories from their childhood days. He had also wonder if its possible for him to collect Eddie's tears and kept them in a little tiny bottle. Of course, that would be amazing.

      Eddie were still crying out loud like a little child lost in the middle of no where when Ben thought that the perfect thing to do right then was to give Eddie more gift and suprises. Eddie would be so happy that he'll keep on crying till Benjamin wants him to stop.

     He took out a blue black collar from his back pocket and wears it on Eddie's neck.

   Aware of the movement, Eddie stop his crying and look at Benjamin hands on his neck. He flinched away when he saw what was being put on but it was simply too late when the collar were lock around his neck.

"What is this?" Eddie ask in shocking fear.

"Your life saviour." Ben calmly replied.

"To save me from what?"

" The outside world. Come, let me show you just how much safe it keeps you."

     Ben took Eddie's hand and lead him to the front door. He took out the same collar and lock it around a thick red book on the table near. After he put the collar in the middle of the book, he turn on the swith as the bulb on the center of the collar turn blue.

"This collar connects to the sensor I had installed on the door and any movement, in and out of this door while turning on this collar will inflict effect on the person."

"Effect?" Eddie frown his eyebrows in confusion.

"Yup and the example is as followed."

     Benjamin open the front door wide. Wide enough that if Eddie had run for his life at that moment, he would've been able to escape. But he didn't. This time, his gut is telling him not to even go near that front door.

     It was dark outside and only then Eddie had realize that it was night time already. Usually he never knows whether its morning or night or evening.

     When the doors wide open and Eddie could have only stared in shock, Ben throw the book outside. The collar make a beeping sound as a red light suddenly showed and in less than 2 seconds being in the air, the collar on the book as if shrink to a smaller size ripped the thick book in half. The sound of layers of papers being shred echoed in Eddie's head as he gasped.

His hand automatically touch the collar. He stared at the book in front of him. This can't be happening. He wanted to look at Benjamin but his terrified enough at the moment.

      Benjamin smirk when he saw the look on Eddie's face. 

      He had been through hell getting this collar make since the only resource he had was a goddamn book. Technology slows everything, Benjamin think to himself.

    Ben lean on the door facing Eddie as he smugly smile.

"So, you see, let's say that if you ever got taken away from me or you somehow escaped, this thing..." Ben grip the collar on Eddie's neck hard "will kill you first. Remember Eddie, if I can't have you, then no one else can. Not even God. Understood?"

      The whole time, Eddie's gaze is only on the now broken book. If he left the house, he would end up just like that.

Head ripped from his body.