Secret Admirer

Chapter 49: According to Her

Soul's POV

Nothing good seems to be coming out of all of this waiting. It's really starting to get me mad and worried all at the same time. When is Maka going to wake up?

I've been sitting here in this spot for a long time and I hate it. But I don't want to move because I want to be the first one that Maka sees. Did she feel this way when I was in a coma?

Did Maka stay by my side the whole time I was like that? Did she feel the same way I'm feeling right now? If so, I now know why she was so hurt when she spoke to me.

She needs to wake up. I don't want to feel this feeling anymore. I know she felt like this when I was in that coma but I don't think I can do that.

I have to see her awake and smiling at me telling me I'll be okay. She needs to wake up and I'll stop torturing myself like this. I want to be here for her but I can't seem to do that when she isn't waking up.

I know I know it's selfish of my to want this waiting pain to go away while she went through it alone as well. She actually went through the whole thing the whole time and I can't seem to do that.

She's so much stronger then me and I know because she was able to wait for so long just for me. But I'm wanting her to wake up now so I can forget this pain right away.

Knock Knock ~

I quickly lifted my head and wiped the tears away from my cheeks before turning toward the door. I sat straight up in my seat and watched as BlackStar walked further into the room.

"Hey dude." He smiled sadly. "How are you?"

I turned my head away and looked back at Maka for a second before turning back to look at him.

"I'm tired." I softly spoke the truth. "I'm tired of waiting for so long. I love her BlackStar. But I can't keep waiting forever just to see her."

Out of no where, BlackStar punched the wall behind him and pushed himself off the wall he was leaning on. He walked toward me with his fists on his side. With a quick motion, he grabbed the front of my shirt and pulled me toward him.

"You selfish asshole." He sneered. "If you love her you will wait longer no matter how much time it will take! She waited forever for you! She cried and cried so much her tears might as well be a fucking ocean! She stayed by your side and ignored the whole world! She even starved because she didn't want to leave the damn room thinking you will wake up and won't see her there! She skipped so much school! You weren't awake to hear the rumors everyone was making about her at school! You weren't awake to see her heart breaking every time she looked at you hoping to see your eyes open!"

I stared at him, speechless. I didn't know what to say to him. He was right and I know it since I wasn't awake. I didn't know they were making rumors about her when she was here.

"I came here a couple of times by myself." He looked at me with red eyes.

This is the first time I'm actually looking at him. His eyes were blood shot and his hair was more messier then what it normally looked like. He was a complete mess and I didn't care to look until now.

"She cried on my shoulder." He sighed heavily. "She didn't like how she was being treated by her father. He beat her and I'm sure you've found that out. Her mother left her when she just a child. No siblings, so she's been alone in a crap house being beaten by herself. She's dealt with so much pain that she is use to it. But when you came and fully introduced yourself to her life she found a new kind of pain. A pain that she has never experienced before and now that you are giving her so much, she's dying further. She's getting torn apart and no one fucking knows it. I should have never given you that dare. But you should have told me you loved Maka and you were serious, I wouldn't have made you take that dare. I don't know who to blame, me or you. Because it's my fault that you got into that coma, but it's also your fault for not saying you seriously loved Maka."

My heart felt all twisted up and I didn't know what to do. I know he's right but I don't want to face that fact. It is my fault that I took that dare. The first thing he asked me was, "Do you love Maka?"

What did I say? No. She was only a friend that was amusing me.

I should've told him the truth. He asked me in a serious voice so I'm sure he wouldn't have made fun of me if I told him. But I didn't want to. Why? Because deep down I was still embarrassed to be seen around her.

Selfish. I'm a selfish asshole. Now Maka is in a coma and all I'm doing is thinking of myself right now. I'm finally seeing what's going on and I hate what I'm seeing.

"If she dies." BlackStar cried. "I'll feel guilty because of what I've done. She was a good friend and before I even got to know her I treated her like shit. She was shot then and there and her blood got on me. I was so terrified at what was happening that I didn't help stop the blood. I didn't stop Crona from running away."

BlackStar cried and cried and I couldn't do anything. I didn't know what to do. I was also to blame. She pushed me out of the way to protect me because she really did love me. But I'm here, alive, and she's there, close to dying.

"Soul."

I quickly lifted my head and looked around the room. BlackStar was now on his knees crying his eyes out. I looked back and forth but I couldn't find who called my name.

"Soul?"

My heart stopped for a second. I turned toward Maka and saw her smiling at me. I smiled with tears falling and I jumped toward her. She held me in her arms tightly, like she didn't want to let go.

"Maka!" I cried. "I was so worried! I'm so glad you're awake now!"

Maka looked at me and smiled. She leaned forward and kissed me on the forehead. It gave me chills and I didn't know why but it felt a little strange. She went to my ear and whispered something to me.

My heart beat fast for a second until her sentence made sense. I looked at her and saw her smile still in place. She leaned forward and kissed me on the lips.

I shut my eyes tightly and allowed the kiss to happen. I couldn't stop the tears from falling so I just let it be. She pulled away and leaned further into the bed.

With one last smile, she closed her eyes and went back to sleep. She was tired after all. She just woke up from a coma that lasted almost a month.