Let Me Go [Sequel to Lost, Hopeless, and Destroyed]

Chapter 14

*Autumn's POV*

I woke up to find myself on Zach's couch. What's going on? I sit up slowly and my head is throbbing. Hangover, fuck.

I look around and I dont see Zach anywhere in sight. I look and see a note taped on the dresser. I go to read it.

Auts,

I went out for a little while. I'll be back soon. And I'm sorry, but... I told your parents about your recent behavior lately. I didn't tell them about the eating disorder though, you'll have to do that on your own. But I've noticed you have been trying harder so I know you have it under control, am I correct? I hope so. Love you Auts, and again, I'm sorry. Your parents are home btw, you can stay or go.

Love you.

-Zachy

He told them?!?! That son of a bitch! I love Zach, but I thought I could trust him enough to keep my secrets... guess not. At least he didn't say anything about the anorexia/bulimia.

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I finally make it home, and see my muther on the couch, crying her eyes out. My eyes widen in fear when she notices me. I stood there, scared of what she will say.

"Oh Autumn, honey." She walks over to me and hugs me, sniffling.

"Mum, I'm okay..." I trail off, hugging her back.

"Why didn't you tell us sooner?" She asked. "You know you can come to me with anything."

"I know mum, I'm sorry." All of a sudden, my dad walks into the room.

"Autumn..." I already know what he is gonna say, and he knows I know, so he doesn't say anything. He just comes to me and hugs me. I hug back of course.

They pull back and they sit on the couch. They tell me to come sit down to, but I don't. I just stand there.

"I'm so so sorry." I start sobbing.

"We're gonna get you the help you need." My dad says calmly to me.

"What? No, I'm not going off to come rehab or some shit!"

"No honey, just a therapist or someone you can talk to." My mum explains to me.

"SO A SHRINK? Like someone that crazy people talk to.."

"No, it's not like that at all Autumn."

"Oh okay. I know I will. I want to get better." I flash a smile. "I'm just sorry I didn't tell you guys sooner. I was just scared."

"We're just glad we can help you Autumn, we love you." They smile.

"I love you too." I tell them.

My mom comes up to me, "You can trust me, I've been through a similar situation." She says. I nodd.

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*1 week later*

It's about 2 am. I'm up in my room. I started seeing a therapist about 4 days ago. I think it's all a load of crap and a waste of my time honestly.

I'm crying not to cut anymore, or take pills, drink, or smoke, and I haven't so far. It's been hard though. But I never said anything about not throwing up, or start eating again. That I can't do. It's just too hard. Plus the erge to cut is itching on my skin, making me want to throw up.

I get a whole bunch of texts, all from Emily, telling me to go die, and that I'm fat and ugly. God, could life get any worse?!

I fall on my bed and cry my eyes out. I miss Liam, and Rachel. But they left me. Zach sold me out. Everybody else hates me. My parents say they understand, but do they really?

They might some what, but they will never truly understand what I've went through, no one will.

I go to the bathroom and open the medicine cabnit. I pull out a bottle and pour out the white pills into my hand. I stare at them for who knows how long. I'm shaking.

"Life isn't worth living anymore." I mumble to myself and am about to throw the pills into my mouth. Until something stops me, I don't know what it is. But it's something. I have this funny feeling. But I shake it off. I see Snickers, my cat, rub up against my leg. I cry just thinking about how I'm leaving her. She will be okay though. Everyone will be...

I throw the pills into my mouth and swallow them dry. I then get a glass of water and dry to get ride of the dryness in my mouth and throat.

I sigh and start to sob to myself in my bathroom. When did it all become too much? I don't know, but I do know that once my heart stops beating, I will finally be happy.

No more hate. No more worrying. No more crying. No more self destructive behavior. No more pain...

I start to feel a little dizzy after I finish off the last of the remaining white pills. My breathing hitches. My vision becomes foggy. Before I know it, I fall to the bathroom floor. I cry and try to catch my breathing, but it gets away from me, leaving me breathless... Lifeless.

At least once I'm gone, I'll be able to be with Rachel and Liam. I will be able to finally be free and happy with the outcome.

I feel my eyes start to get heavy, so I don't even bother on resisting. I slowly close my eyes and am greated by darkness.

My serenity..