A letter to someone who died.
Dear John
There are so many things that I'd like to say to you but I don't how.
Yeah, I just quoted Wonderwall, a song you love to hate.
How in the world can someone hate Wonderwall? I really don't get it.
You're gone.
Let me repeat that you're gone.
You have been for two years and Christ knows I should accept it but I can't.
Because it still feels like you're around with your goofy smirk and idiotic jokes.
You're still here and we're not talking because we're in this huge ass fight.
A fight, which is your fault, of course.
Much like most or rather all our fights.
I have to believe that you're here because if I don't then that means that I lost my best friend and you know what that means don't you?
I've lost myself too.
Tarun, you and I had this blood pact that me and him didn't go through with. We're cowards, really and we're sorry.
I put too much importance on words, don't I?
If I really did have a way with words as I've led myself to believe, then I'd be able to write to you, whatever it is that I feel.
But I can't.
My fingers become numb and stuck. They're unable to let the words flow, when it comes to you.
I'm going to keep this short and crisp.
You're the bestest friend I could've ever asked for and I'm sorry.
I'm sorry that the last words I said to you were, "I hate you."
I'm sorry that I didn't say whatever fucked up version of goodbye we had to say.
I'm sorry that I didn't come to your funeral or ever visit your grave.
I'm sorry for so many things but I'm mostly sorry for the way things have turned out.
I know you expected Sara to handle everything after you left, but that's easier said than done, mostly because Sara isn't herself anymore and the other two have left.
There's no relationship between the four of us and honestly, what did we expect?
It was obviously going to be this way.
You were the glue that held us together.
But no point in dwelling on things of the past.
You were the cheesiest and the creepiest romantic I've ever met so tell me something?
Does love actually even exist in this world?
Not the friendship or family type love but the forever type of love?
Because it failed for me and for Taz and Sara and Kavya.
Me with her and Taz and Sara with each other and Kavya with you.
News Flash, you're a Grade A idiot for never seeing how much she loved you.
Actually loved you.
And no one has ever loved anyone as much as she loved you, well except me loving her but that doesn't matter for now.
You're in heaven now, so I gotta ask you for a ginormous favour.
Hook Kavya up with the best guy, you can find. A guy who will treat her like a princess because she deserves it. People have treated her like shit for her entire life.
Including me and YOU.
And please make sure that Taz and Sara end up together.
They're idiots for not realising how much they're meant for each other.
And as for me?
I want four things from you.
First one being, make sure she knows how much I love her. Make sure she never forgets that.
Second one is that all my happiness goes to her. I don't mind being sad for the rest of my life as long as she's happy and smiling.
Third one is that try to make sure whoever she ends up with, treats her right. That person better be the best damn person in the world.
Fourth one is.....
Drumroll please....
Come back.
Please.
I need you, they need you, we need you.
It seems as if the world is empty and it's worth nothing without you.
There's no point in smiling because you're gone.
We may seem like we're okay but we're far from it.
We need your humour and wisdom and love.
We need our best friend back.
Do that much for me, will you bud?
Love
Navi
