My Irrelevant Roommate

Chapter 17

Life is funny, isn't it?

Have you ever stepped back and just thought, "where am I going with my life?" "who's going to be in my life in 20 years?," "will I ever accomplish anything?"

I think these are the thoughts every college student thinks on a usual basis. Along with anyone over the age of 18.

It's like some days everything seems so perfect, then on others it's like a twister has came through and demolished what we have had lined up for years. We're left picking up pieces of our remains from there on out. It's not our choice, but we wish it was.

And lastly of course, we get those some days where we're just lost in thought. Mindlessly daydreaming of what could have been, what could be, and what is yet to come. Today is one of those days for me.

I lean against the counter at Ve Bene and watch as the last couple exists for the night. They walk out hand in hand, laughing at something that was said between them. They both look as if they are lost in love and they don't want to be found. I can't blame them. I would be the same way if I was in their shoes.

"Penny for your thought?" Ian asks, coming out of the back with dish towels in his hands. He throws me one and picks up some of the dishing we've had drying on the drying rack this afternoon. I catch the towel and walk over to start drying them off as well.

"How do you know when you meet the right guy? Or if you've met the right guy?"

I can't help but ask these questions. They have been the only questions imprinted in my mind since I've last seen Cody. Could it be fate that's bringing us back together? Or could it be fate that I've found myself crushing on my roommate instead? Is this all just a coincidence?  Could the person i'm meant to be with for the rest of my life already be in my life?

Out the corner of my eye I see Ian's facial expression deepen. He thinks hard on the question, pondering what his answer should be.

"I guess you don't.. Or maybe you do. It's all about that gut feeling, you know? Like I believe I met my soulmate two years ago and I had this gut feeling she was going to be the one."

He doesn't look at me as he says this. In fact I can tell he's trying his best not to look at me.

"She's wasn't?" I ask trying to understand what's going on inside his brain.

"I'd like to think she was, but things didn't fall into place like I thought they would. I met her when I first started school here. Her name was Heather.. Heather Singleton."

With a cup in hand, Ian slowly spins it clearing out the rest of the water. A small smile forms on the side of his lips, and he looks straight ahead at most likely nothing.

"We were two kids in love. The typical love story. I ran into her, bumped her books everywhere and awkwardly helped her pick them up. After we parted I came here to work and that same night she wondered in for a cup a coffee. We sat and talked for hours. Within a week, we were official."

A silence grows around us and Ian's smile fades. He places the cup down on the counter and his eyes flick down to his feet.

"8 months after we met I asked her to marry me. She said yes of course,"

He shuffles his weight between his legs. Something someone does when the topic is uncomfortable. I've learned this in my psychology class.

"But unfortunately our love story was cut short when she was diagnosed with stage 5 metastatic breast cancer.. There was no cure,"

A horrifying sadness sweeps in and takes the happy Ian I've ever known away. He brings his hand up and itches his nose. "It wasn't long after that" he finishes and I can see he's done talking about the subject.

I set down the cup I have in my hands. My heart shatters.

"I-" i stutter. "I... I'm incredibly sorry."

Cancer fucked up my family and I can relate so well. It is one of the most painful things not only to the person you're having to let go, but to yourself because you wish there was something you could do. Some people get lucky though, and those are the true heroes.

"Yeah, like I said, go with the gut feeling." Ian speaks up and picks up the empty box that the dishes were in.  "Even if it doesn't come with a happy ever after, it'll be worth it."

He then brushes past me and walks into the back. I furrow my eyebrows. Why is life like this? Why does it always take away the good? If that was Ian's soulmate, does that mean he'll be alone forever now? He doesn't deserve to be alone. He's such a good guy. I guess that's why I've never seen him with anyone though. A mark like the one that's left on his heart will take a lifetime to heal.

_-_

A/N

Sorry I haven't been updating. This is just a filler chapter btw. Learning a little about Ian and such.

My aunt's cancer has spread and it doesn't look too good. I've been at doctor appointment after doctor appointment with her and there are many more to come, hopefully. I don't need your condolences though, so please don't give me your pity. All I ask is if you have a free moment, please send out a quick prayer. It's been a hectic last couple of days with just spending time with her, but I wouldn't trade it for the world. I've decided on making beanies to donated to the cancer center though and that's mainly the reason I haven't been writing. My hand is honestly about to fall off lol. But in my case, it's worth it.

On top of all of this too, my dads best friends son passed away last night. Hence the reason I wrote this chapter at 2 am. It's just been a little too chaotic at the Tyler house. Life needs to take a chill pill before I do.

Bare with me these next couple weeks. College starts Monday and I really don't know how often i'll be able to update. But I can tell you guys this; I KNOW HOW IT'S GONNA END! Not life, but this book at least. The other day when my wifi was down, i sat outside under a tree and wrote it all out of exactly what I want to come out of this book. You're all going to be very surprised. Expect the unexpected.

Until next time, much love-// K.L.