Forbidden

Chapter 3

Ashlyn's POV

I'm happy that Adam is officially moving to nights tonight. I know things will get a little easier here at home. I just have to wait a little later to come home to make sure he's not here but I'm fine with that. I'm probably not going to see him till he has a day off and I still probably won't see him then. He's always out doing something. Sometimes he's out with friends, goes out of town or stays with some random girl. He tries to hide it but I find out anyway. I don't really care though. I want him to just break up with me and go for which ever girl he's sleeping with now. I only know that because he hasn't been wanting a lot of sex from me lately. I'm happy that he doesn't. I don't want to have sex with him. I haven't been attracted to him since things became like this. I've wanted nothing to do with him. 

I got woke up from Adam kissing my neck as he wrapped his arms around me. I hate when he's like this. I know exactly what he wants. That's not what I want. I was hoping he wouldn't be awake. He was up sort of late for him last night. I rolled over so that I was looking at him. He just smirked before roughly pressing his lips against mine. He quickly pushed his tongue into my mouth. I tried to pull away but he moved a hand up, gripping my face to keep me from pulling away. I hate it when he's like this. I just hate him. I just want this all to stop. I'm going to put a stop to everything within the next few months. I'll finally be able to get away. At least I hope I'll be able to. That's if he doesn't go more crazy than he already is. I really never know what he'll do to me or what he's capable of. He moved so that he was hovering over me. I felt him moving his hand up under my shirt. I moved my hand so it was on top of his to try and keep him from doing anything else. He finally pulled away from the kiss, "Don't stop this, babe."

"Adam, I don't want to do this."

He rolled his eyes before moving his head down and started kissing my neck again. He started moving his hand up, even with me trying to stop him. I felt him started to harshly suck on my sweet spot. I groaned, "Adam stop. Not today."

He pulled away from my neck to look at me. I can tell he's angry. I felt him grab onto my shorts, "We're doing this. Now act like the fucking slut I know you are."

"Adam, I really don't want to do this."

I felt him smack me across my face, "I really don't care what you want. You do whatever I say."

I felt tears start to escape my eyes from the sting. I really don't want this. I noticed him start to smirk as he pulled off my shorts. He quickly pulled off his boxers before sliding on a condom before he roughly pushed himself into me. I can't help but groan from the pain. He always hurts me when we're like this together. He was different when we first got together. I was a teenager then. He was always a little older than me. About 5 years. My parents loved him though so they really didn't care. He roughly gripped my hips before thrusting into me as hard as he could. God this hurts. I just want this to be over with. He's always so rough. I can't help it when a few more tears escaped from my eyes from the pain. It hurts so much. More emotionally than physically. I feel like I'm a waste of space when I'm around him. Almost like I'm not even a human being anymore. Especially to him. I felt him grip one of my legs before wrapping it around him. If it was even possible he was being rougher than before. I need to stop crying before he sees it. He'll probably hit me again because of it. He's done that before. He let out a moan before pressing his lips back against mine. I let mine move in sync with his. I started clenching my walls around him. I really hope this hurries him up. I want it to be over with already. Knowing him he might even make me have sex with him again. He let out a moan into the kiss before pulling away and hiding it in my neck as he continued thrusting in and out of me. I know he's getting close. Thank god. I can't take this anymore. I know this was for him to have some pleasure. It's defiantly not for me. I don't know what it's like to be pleasured anymore. Especially after the past few years. I clenched my walls around him again when he moaned, "Dammit. Do that again."

I did it again. I know he would probably hit me again if I didn't. He let out an even louder moan. I clenched my walls around him one last time. That's when he moaned out, releasing into the condom. I'm glad he's wearing that. He always does but I'm on birth control too to make sure I don't get pregnant by him. I don't want to do that to myself. I don't think he knows about the birth control though. That's none of his business. I did it to make sure everything would be fine for me. He thrusted a few more times before pulling out. He roughly pecked my lips, "God, you feel amazing, babe."

I smiled a little as he moved so he was laying next to me. I know he wanted some kind of response out of me when he said that. I'm not happy with him saying that. I really want it all to stop. I really need to get ready for dance. I need a shower though. I really want his smell off of me. I noticed him take off the condom before tossing it into the small trashcan by the bed. He rolled over so that he was looking at me, "You really need to get on some sort of birth control, babe."

"Why?"

"I want to feel you. Not that condom. They're so damn uncomfortable."

"I don't know."

He frowned, "Then think about it."

"I will."

I'm a little surprised that was his thoughts on it. I thought he would have gave me birth control since he can write the prescription for it. I'm really happy he doesn't know about my OB/GYN that gives me my birth control. I'm sure he would have got rid of the condoms then. I don't trust him though. I don't want to catch anything. I know that is a possibility. Especially since I know he sleeps around. I'm not upset about any of that. I just don't want to be catching anything then ruin things for me in the future when I finally find someone decent. Someone who doesn't treat me like this. 

I mumbled, "I really need to get ready for dance."

He didn't say anything as I got up and walked into our bathroom. I closed and locked the door behind me. I really don't want him coming in here. I know he would want to have sex again if he did that. I can't deal with that today. I'm still upset about just now. I turned on the water before pulling the shirt off since he didn't want to waste time doing that while he was taking everything else off me. I got into the shower. I closed my eyes as I felt the warm water run over my skin. I let myself slid down to the floor as the water ran over me. I can't help but start crying. I always end up like this after he does things like this. It's just upsetting when he does this. Almost like this is all my fault. I know it's not. I told him not to. I didn't want that. I don't understand what I did to deserve all this, all the abuse and sex whenever he wants it. He's never gentle. It all hurts. That's all he does. He just hurts me. It wasn't like this at first. If it was I wouldn't have moved in with him then all this wouldn't have started. I can't really tell people, he would just hurt me. Hurt me worse than he already does. I really don't think I can deal with him doing this to me again. I need away. I just need a little bit more money to make sure I can. Maybe I can make some of the money sooner. I could always get a part time job. I really don't care. I just really need away. Maybe I can talk to Sam. He's the only person that knows exactly what's going on. I don't want to ask for help though. I want to get away on my own. I may not be able to. I know as soon as I get away he might find me. He probably will. He's crazy enough for that. 

My thoughts got interrupted by him knocking on the bathroom, "Hurry up Ashlyn. I gotta take a piss."

I sighed before getting up and turning off the water. I really hope he doesn't noticed I've been crying. I'm not in the mood for him to hit me again.

Harry's POV 

I'm kind of happy to go to dance today. I fucking hate dance but I get to see Ashlyn. She's so beautiful. I'm sure I don't have a chance still but I get to see her. I've loved seeing her wear the tight little shorts the past few days. They make her ass look amazing. 

Every time I touch her at dance though. I get this sort of spark. I really hope I'm not the only one that feels that. Maybe I can figure it out. I doubt she'll even want to say anything to me even though she's tried before. This is all so different to me. I'm used to girls wanting to come up to me and hook up. I usually go for it. Well I used to. That was until I got tired of that group of friends. I got away from it about 9 months ago. They still try and bother me about it. I don't let them though. I'm fine by myself. I still have a few friends left though. They were never involved with any of that though. 

Maybe today I'll stop being such an asshole towards her. I'm so used to being this way though. It used to attract girls before. That's different with her. She just doesn't want anything to do with me being like that. Maybe I can change that.