It's Just Ann

Chapter 27 - Rejection

ATTENTION! I have posted Gareth's POV on the "Aware Princess Series (Extra Material)" book, so look for it on my profile. It's titled "Pretty".

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        I'm not sure what's wrong but it seems Gareth is avoiding me. Not like I did, but similar. When we run into each other he barely meets my eyes and he usually has to leave quite soon after. We exchange a few words but nothing significant, which feels so weird. I know that's how normally he is, colder even, but never with me. Not after all this time, which makes me wonder what's happening. Is he annoyed with me? Did I do something to bother him?

I think about it a lot, wondering what could make him feel uncomfortable next to me, and then it hits me. My feelings, my obvious and apparently harmless feelings that I just wanted to enjoy are make him uncomfortable. That is the only thing that makes sense in my head, because it must be annoying having a silly girl crushing on you, hanging around you, trying to get your attention when you've clearly have stated you have no interest to have a relationship with anyone.

Ella said to enjoy my own feelings for as long as I could and didn't bother him, but if they have actually started to annoy him, then I should really move on. I don't have the ability to hide my love and adoration, I can't even control my smile when I see him. Of course he must feel troubled. I doubt he expected more than a friend when he talked to me, but instead he got a girl crushing on him, head over heels who keeps hanging around, trying to change what is a fact.

Why do I try to look prettier for him? Because I want him to like me even if he told me he didn't want to like anyone. I'm actually trying to make him do something he is against. Isn't that annoying and a reason to be angry with me? I'd certainly be and I'd try to keep a distance from that annoying person, but without being rude because of respect for the previous friendship.

It was wrong of me trying to seduce Gareth. What a stupid idea! As if I could even seduce him or whatever. That was hopeless from the beginning and what caused was this.

What a bad, bad idea!

And I'm so angry at myself for even trying to change things from how they were that when it's announced a party that night, I don't want to go. I only want to head back home, lock myself in my room and sulk for the humongous mistake I made and how this might cost me my friendship with Gareth.

Of course, that's just the plan in my head because Cece has something completely different in mind.

"Oh hell no," he snaps when I share my plan of just going home after the shooting ends for the day. "Who told you you are allowed to go home? We are going to that party."

"I really don't feel in the mood, Cece," I try to convince him but he shakes his head. I heave a deep sigh, rounding my shoulders as I keep playing with the straw in my coffee.

I came to see him with a coffee for him and I and he was the one who told me about the party. It was Mare's invitation for everyone because she sold certain amount of records, number I can't remember, so her label is throwing a party and she's also inviting everyone in the production. Actors and crew member. I considered it for a second, but then Cece also told me that even Gareth was going so it was a chance for me to try a different approach.

"But why?!" he whines. "Let's go have fun and if you're in a bad mood it'll help you. Come on! Are you really letting me go on my own? Pete can't go because he has a night shoot."

I want to tell him why I don't want to go, about Gareth avoiding me and how I regret ever trying to change his mid and make him see me as something more than a friend. But the words don't leave my mouth, they are stuck in my throat and make me feel so tired because even breathing feels like a difficult task.