I'm Not Okay ☞ Stylinson

Chapter 3

Cupcake Harry bc why not <333

~Harry's POV~

I woke up with my head pounding and my body aching. Everything hurts and I can't really remember what happened, at least not in detail.

I stayed where I was for a few more minutes mentally preparing myself to interact with people. Honestly? I just wasn't in the mood. I felt like curling up in a corner and crying my eyes out.

I thought back to what Zayn said about how no one wants me here. He's right. I'm a waste of space. Life would be so much better without me in it, so why am I still here?

I don't really have any motivation to do anything anymore. I don't feel like wasting my energy on all the pointless day to day bullshit of life. I don't wanna be sad, I don't wanna have a messed up mind or life anymore. But I'm still here.

I couldn't quite pinpoint why that is until someone saved me from Zayn and Liam. It made me realize that no matter how hard I try to completely give up, I always hold on to that tiny shred of hope and that's what stops me. It stops me every time.

Hope is a dangerous yet beautiful thing. It has the power to keep you alive, to keep you going. Sadly, when it's taken away though, it also has the power to push you over the edge and break you entirely.

I was running out of hope but whoever helped me today made sure to give me more. I don't know how I'm suppose to feel about that. Thankful? Angry? Sad? I don't know if I'll be able to take anymore false hope and disappointments.

My thoughts were getting a little too depressing for my liking and I didn't need anymore of that right now. Thankfully something distracted me from my mind. I had the feeling someone was staring at me but I just ignored it.

I figured I should probably get up now and find out what was going on. I slowly opened my eyes, squinting at the light. It was really bright and definitely wasn't making my head feel any better.

Once I adjusted to it, I opened my eyes fully. I certainly wasn't expecting to see someone hovering over me. It wasn't just anyone though, It was Louis. I was beyond shocked. Why was he with me? He's never noticed me before.

My eyes widened and my mouth slightly opened as I saw him staring right into my eyes. It felt like he was burning a hole right through me. I took the opportunity to gaze into his bright blue ones.

I've never gotten the chance to look at Louis' eyes up close but now I have, and wow. They were the prettiest blue I've ever seen, almost like the ocean. I couldn't take my eyes off him.

A minute or two passed before he cleared his throat and sheepishly looked away. I looked down and felt my face heat up. He moved away trying to create space between us. As he did this, his thigh accidentally brushed against mine and I nearly shivered.

I looked around the unfamiliar house and took in my surroundings. It was nice and had a really homey feeling to it.

I kept looking around and when I finally registered what just happened, I was beyond speechless. I, Harry Styles, was here with the Louis Tomlinson. The one that always clouded my thoughts and snuck into my dreams. I've been pinning over him since 7th grade and I'm a senior now. He's all I've ever wanted and so much more. I'd do anything if it meant being able to call this boy mine.

I still wasn't sure what happened and why I was here but I couldn't ask. No way. I'd make such a fool of myself, probably stuttering the entire time.

"I'm Louis, I don't think we've met before. What's your name?" He had a warm smile on his face as he spoke.

On the inside I was freaking out but I couldn't let him know that. I tried my best to play it cool and act like I'm not completely and utterly in love with him. Problem is, I am.

"Harry." I mentally fist pumped myself as I went to stand up. Totally nailed it.

I continued praising myself for not being awkward and embarrassing when I quite literally, tripped on air. I braced myself for the impact but it never came. Instead, I fell into the muscular arms of none other than Louis Tomlinson.

"Oops" I whispered to myself.

"Hi" he chuckled.

I didn't think it was possible for me to fall in love with him more, but I did.

Any thoughts on how I could make this book better?

-Anna xx