Little Do You Know: Jaspar (boyxboy)

0.4 » Caspar's Great Idea

Caspar's POV

The two things in this world I love: Joe and pizza. Put them together, and it's the best days ever. Being with Joe in general can make my mood be happy. But when it's him and pizza, it's a dream come true. And we even had cheek kisses. You can't tell me that's not heaven.

I love reading comments from Jaspar fans. They give me hope. But it's false hope. Joe is straight. Everyone thinks I'm straight. Jaspar will sadly never happen. That's why I'm not confessing to him anytime soon. At least I hope not to. Who knows what could happen.

"How's the Jaspar fandom holding up?" Joe asks me. I laugh. I love all my fans. I love all the Jaspar shippers. I just love everyone who gives me positive feedback. I don't know how much more haters I can take. I've even seen hate pages for me on Instagram. But I've also seen a lot of fan pages. It's the fan pages that keep me going.

"They are going ape-shit," I reply. Joe scoffs. Holy shit! I just got an idea. The greatest idea ever! I hope Joe thinks it's good too.

"Joe! Joe Joe Joe Joe!" I say to Joe. He rolls his eyes, but plays along.

"What Caspar? Caspar Caspar Caspar Caspar," Joe says, shaking my arm. It's my turn to do the eye rolling.

"You know how my parents have a house/cabin like thing in Inverness?" I ask him impatiently. This idea is going to knock him off of his socks. Ew, why did I just say that? I heard that saying from my parents. When you miss your parents, I guess you start sounding like them. I shouldn't be complaining. My parents are cool.

"Yeah."

"You know how I have that van that I always wanted to drive?" I ask Joe, getting more excited by the second.

"Yeah."

"I was thinking me, you, Alfie, Zoe, Marcus, and Niomi could go there. Kind of like a road trip since it's about 9 hours away. We can take the van and it would be so much fun!" I say excitedly. A huge smile spreads across Joe's face.

"Caspar, that's brilliant. How long would we stay?" he asks me in a cheerful tone.

"Today is Saturday. If we leave tomorrow in the morning, then we can stay for a week. Sound good to you?" I ask Joe. Joe beams and grabs his phone.

"Just text someone on the list. This will be amazing!" Joe says as he types away. I laugh at Joe's excitement. Usually I'm the overly excited one. I call Marcus. He answers on the second ring.

Marcus: what up man?

Me: let's go on a road trip!

I explain the whole thing to Marcus. I include who's invited, the schedule. Marcus said he could go, and so can Niomi. I hang up on him after he said he could go.

"Marcus can go! Niomi can, too," I say to Joe. Joe shushes me. I think he's talking to Zalfie.

"Zalfie can go," Joe says. I smile. This is going to be the best trip ever!

Me and Joe go to our rooms to pack our things. We are going to leave early tomorrow.

"Are we going to film there?" I yell at Joe. If I yell loud enough, Joe can hear me through the wall. I love this flat.

"Yeah! Just not everyday and everything. It's supposed to be holiday I guess," Joe yells back. I pack all my filming stuff, just in case.

I just start throwing my clothes into a suitcase. I don't even care if it's clean or dirty. I'm throwing shoes into bags, shirts into bags. I suck at packing.

I bet Joe is neatly folding his clothes in his bag. I hate to admit it, but Joe is a lot more clean then me. And a lot more neat then me.

I try to pick out my outfit for tomorrow. It has to be something comfortable. Eh, fuck being comfortable. I take a pair of black skinny jeans and a white and black stripped shirt and put them on the ground neatly. I take a random baseball hat and put it with my clothes for tomorrow. I find a random grey hoodie and place it with my hat and clothes.

After I figure out tomorrow's outfit, I continue throwing clothes into my bags.

-

"Joe. I'm done packing," I yell. I take all my bags (four to be exact) and place them by my bedroom door. I have two backpacks filled with candy, gum, earbuds, magazines, stuff like that. I have a duffle bag packed with clothes. I have a rolling suitcase with clothes.

"Me too," Joe says. I look at my phone. 9 pm. I walk over to Joe's room. He has two big bags of clothes packed. He has a backpack packed too. Probably food, water, shit like that.

"I have two backpacks full of food, magazines, things like that," I tell Joe. Joe nods his head.

"We better go to sleep early if we want to leave early," Joe says. I nod and go back to my own room.

I lay there awake. I'm really excited for this trip. I hope something good happens between me and Joe. This may says cliché, but I fell asleep thinking about Joe.

-

"Why would I ever love you? You're a failure. I could have been dead when I fell down the steps. What did you do? You called Zoe. Idiot!" Joe yells at me in the morning. I feel the tears roll down my face.

"I only confessed to you because I thought you'd be nice about it! I didn't think you'd be a dick about it!" I yell back. Joe shoves me. I fall to the ground. He's never shoved me that hard before. In fact, he's never shoved me at all.

"I hate you, Caspar Lee," Joe says to me. I stare at him before making the biggest mistake of my life.

"I hate you too," I say back. The words were poisonous. I don't hate Joe. I just have to pretend I do. I can't say 'no Joe I love you with all my heart. I want us to be together forever.' He would hate me even more then he already does.

"I'm moving out, asshole," Joe says to me. I stare at him. He really does hate me.

"Why?" I ask dumbly. Why would I ask that? Of course I know why he's moving out. He hates me. Why would he stay?

Joe comes over to me and starts shaking me. What the fuck?

"Wake up, Caspar," he yells. I start feeling overheated.

I sit up in my bed, sweating and gasping. Joe is standing next to my bed. He sighs, like a weight has been lifted off of his shoulders.

"Finally! You're awake," he says, relieved. It was all a dream. Joe doesn't know I love him. Joe doesn't hate me. Joe isn't moving out. I sigh in relief.

That scared me a lot. Not only at the fact that he physically hurt me, but the emotional pain hurt me. I don't know if I could take that.

"Yes I am. Now get out. I need to change," I say with smile on my face, looking at Joe's outfit. He's already dressed. He has grey skinny jeans on. A white t-shirt. He has a black hoodie tied around his waste. He's wearing his black vans. He has a red and black baseball hat on backwards.

His outfit is very similar to mine. My shirt is just striped, my jeans are black, my baseball hat is black, and my hoodie is grey. Our shoes are the same.

"Okay. Don't be too long. I made waffles," Joe says and he leaves my room. He knows I love waffles. Can this boy get any better? But that dream was horrific.

That was, by far, the worst dream I've ever had.

a/n hello guys. if it's unclear, the part when Joe says he hates Caspar is a dream. just clearing that up. i'm just warning you, i don't know how the weather is in Inverness so please bare with me. vote and comment if you like this chapter! i love you all! bye!