Minji's Voice - Bbangsaz

Chapter 28

Hanni's POV

It was very early in the morning, the sun had not yet risen when I quietly opened Minji's door, I let go of Milly, and walked towards the entrance of her house.

I turned the doorknob and it was unlocked, so I tiptoed in, not wanting to wake her.

I took a breath and froze.

Her living room was destroyed, all the books on the floor, furniture and lamps overturned, broken pictures on the floor. My blood ran cold.

Oh God, oh God, oh God.

What had happened here?

The bathroom light was on and the door was ajar, so I could see the short hallway that led to the bedroom. I was walking to her room and my legs felt like jelly and my stomach was upset.

I walked into her room and immediately saw her curled up on her bed, fully dressed.

Her eyes were open, staring at the wall.

I ran towards her.

Her skin was damp and she trembled slightly.

"Minji? Minji? Honey, what's wrong?"

Her eyes moved to me, not seeing me, looking through me.

I started to cry.

"Minji, you're scaring me. What's wrong? Oh God, do you need a doctor? What happened here? Answer me."

Her eyes seemed to lighten a little, moving over my face. Suddenly, with a quick movement, she sat up and grabbed me, her hands moving over my face, my hair, my shoulders. Her expression cleared completely for an instant before torment filled her face and she pulled me towards her harshly, making me scream. She held my body tightly, her body shaking so severely that I almost felt like she was having a seizure in my arms.

Oh God, she thought something had happened to me.

"Oh Minji, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. My phone was ruined. I'm sorry. I dropped it in a puddle in front of McDonalds. I'm sorry," I cried into her chest, clutching her shirt. "I'm so sorry, Minji, honey. I didn't have your number... how stupid. I should have written it down. I'm so sorry. Minji, I'm fine. I'm fine. Sorry."

We held each other for what seemed like hours, her breathing returning to normal. Her body stilled and her grip loosened on me until she finally sat up and looked into my eyes, her own still filled with torment, with something that seemed very close to pain.

"I'm here," I whispered, brushing her hair away from her forehead. "I'm here, Minji."

She raised her hands.

I'd almost forgotten what it felt like , she said, suddenly looking lost, like a little girl. My heart was pounding in my chest, breaking for the woman I loved, so petrified by the loss of me that her mind had shut down in order to deal with her agonizing fear.

Oh, Minji.

I choked back a sob. The last thing she needed right now was for me to lose control.

"How does it feel?" I whispered.

What it feels like to know that you are completely alone.

"You're not, baby. I'm here. I'm not going anywhere. I'm here."

She looked at me then and finally, smiled sadly.

This is the burden I was talking about, Hanni. This is what the burden of loving me looks like.