LUNACY ll Mattheo Riddle x Reader

65. ꜰᴏʀɢɪᴠᴇɴᴇꜱꜱ

apologies for the later-than-usual update, but i'm not kidding when i say that the past four days just flew by in the blink of a fucking eye for me; we owe that all to the two impossibly outrageously unbelievably astounding HP AU fics that i got pulled into; both of which are so incredibly good that i can't name them in fear that all of you guys are gonna leave me and this fic behind for those two (jk, they're "The Disappearances of Draco Malfoy(i know that at least 60% of you have already heard of this))" and "Blood and Gold") omygod, someone go read them and scream at me about em right now cuz they were the best fics i'd ever read in my entire life, everything from the storyline to the writing style, luring me in with the electrifying plot in itself without a 'trope' set in place anywhere, thus bringing in this mad spark of unpredictability (DoDM is a 'what if draco had accepted dumbledore's help' story, and B&G focuses on the slytherins of the 1950s and the writer is so talented that you somehow end up falling for her original characters as well which we all know is a near impossible feat for fanfics) ARGHHHHHHH

anyways, here's a new chapter of my own fic, def quainter in comparison but istg if you guys leave me for either of those two fics, i will either hunt you down and pull a tom riddle on you, but it's more likely that i'm gonna pull a mattheo and start feeling really really sad about myself

speaking of... (and here we go!)

He would never forgive himself for wanting her still.

"I forgive you," she'd whispered to him in the early hours of that dawn. Standing over him as she helped wipe the blood off his face. "Of course I do, Mattheo. The person you were before... That wasn't you."

If only things could be that simple. Yet at the end of the day, the fracturing of a soul meant only the loss of empathy. The madness and the violence had been entirely of his own making.

"That wasn't you," she whispered again, repeating the phrase as though saying it enough times would make it come true. But Mattheo caught the way her voice shook as she spoke her words, the way her hand trembled as she Vanished all traces of blood from his clothes.

"You should go," he told her, in a voice quieter than even hers. It took all the strength in him to manage those three words, but he did it anyway. Because he knew that if he let himself near her once, he would never be able to let go again.

It hurt to see her. Every day in the Great Hall, in between the corridors, during classes themselves. Enzo never left her side, and maybe if Mattheo could spit out the bitter taste that filled his mouth each time he saw them together, he might've taken a moment to mourn the loss of his first and most sacred friendship. Along with an extra few minutes to reflect on just how badly he'd fucked things up with all the rest of them.

The weeks passed by. June crept up on them much faster than he would've liked, and before he knew it, it was graduation day.

Things had been quiet on the Order's end since the previous month's raid on one of the Augurey's holding facilities. This had done nothing to help with his father's paranoia, especially when considering the fact that he now knew that members of the Order of the Phoenix were hunting for his Horcruxes.

Following the Gringotts break-in, the Dark Lord had made a personal visit to the Wizarding Bank himself. Half a dozen goblins had been slaughtered, double the amount of guards had gotten killed.

It was quite the merciful fate, actually, when compared to what Mattheo had done to those who'd aided him in tracking down the perpetrators. He hadn't really cared whether or not Potter and his Order friends got away- Mattheo had just been looking for an excuse to cast the Cruciatus on someone, ever since Y/n had broken up with him, and he hadn't felt like being too picky as to who his victims might be. When his Death Eaters had come reporting back to him of their loss, he'd turned his sights on them instead. One after the next, taking turns with them and coming back in a full circle. The Cruciatus was something that came naturally to him. There was something deliciously addictive about making full fledged killers fall to their knees and writhe at his feet.