Delicate || Emily Prentiss

Chapter 22

I cried a lot that day. I wasn't much help on the case after seeing Emily again. I couldn't concentrate on anything other than her. I never let her out of my eyesight, especially when Doyle was around.

He is dead now, and I can't say I am mad at it. And, probably, neither is Emily. We haven't addressed it yet. Actually, we haven't addressed anything. I think that we are both scared to mention the things that happened and were said the days leading to her death. I really want to forget those moments and the whole fake-death period, and just go back to the way we were if that is even possible.

Today is her first day back to work officially. Until last night, I was looking forward to this day because I thought that it would be another step closer back to our normal. But now it's morning and I am scared to see her back in the field.

I had another nightmare a few hours ago, and I haven't been able to fall asleep again. I just lay in bed, looking at her and feeling her besides me. If I could put her in a protective bubble and never let her out again, I would. It's the first time I am so protective and scared to lose someone. Because I know how life is without her and I don't want to live it again.

I still cry remembering that pain.

"I am so glad you are here" I whisper as I caress her cheek

"You say that every day, I am starting to get worried" she replies, surprising me

"I thought you were asleep" I admit

"I was until maybe a few minutes ago" she says and kisses me.

She finally opens her eyes as she pulls away. Her eyes are full and a soft smile appears on her face. "Don't ever stop looking at me like that. I love you so much" I say

"I love you too. And I missed you too while I was away" she reminds me

"Not as much as I missed you. I am still trying to realize that this is real"

"It is. And it is about to get more real now that I'm coming back fully"

"I am guessing you are referring to going back to work"

"Exactly. So, get your perfect ass up and start getting ready" she pecks my lips and gets out of bed herself. She pulls my hand with her and I force myself up too. "I'll go make breakfast. Peanut butter and jelly?" she suggests

"You know it" I reply and kiss her.

I missed this so damn much. Maybe all will be ok. Nothing has to change. I shouldn't have to worry anymore. But there is one thing I have to take care of; Hotch.

We get to work, like always. Everyone welcomes Emily and I let her have the spotlight as I step into Hotch's office.

"Do you have a moment?" I ask

"Yeah, sure" he answers.

I close the door and I sit across from him. "Is it about Emily?" he assumes

"Sort of. When you put me in for grief counseling and started our weekly evaluations, you knew she was alive. I cried and confessed so many things to you over the last 7 months... But you couldn't say anything?" I wonder, keeping myself calm and contained

"Believe me when I say that I wanted to tell you. It would have made it easier for both of us. But we couldn't take any chances. Doyle could have had eyes and ears everywhere" he explains.

I nod as I stand up. "Alright. Thank you"

"That was all?" he asks, surprised

"Yes. I understand why you didn't tell me, but I would be lying if I said that my trust in you didn't take a hit. That doesn't matter though, because we are here to do a job and, professionally, I have a tremendous amount of respect for you" I confess. "Oh, and I would like to be assigned different person if there are any further evaluations needed"