𝐀 𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐓𝐋𝐄 𝐁𝐈𝐓 𝐎𝐅 𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐘𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆 - ¢нÉяιє ρт.2 (Book #2)

𝐅𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭

Back in May, I was in tears writing the ending to Cherie. Truly, I felt so responsible for causing a fictional character so much pain. I felt dirty, like taking a shower and washing off all the vermin that crawled on my skin because I had done these horrible things to her, and I found pleasure in writing her story. God, t was weird playing god, but at that moment, I cried. 

Tears fell down my face as I wrote the last letter, and tears fell down my face many times before that when I was writing exchanges between Mercedes and Frank. What I didn't realize was what they had done to me, and how they had healed me and closed a lot of books in my life. But, who was I to end their story with a letter?  Who was I to say that her story ended? I love her, I love her story, and I love her quirks. I love her relationship with Matt in its imperfection. I love her life in all the ways that she hates it. So, why would I end it? 

So, I was just drafting and outlining this entire book and I found myself coming across the song "A little bit of everything" if you havent listened to it, please do. I love the cover by Ms.Lizzy McAlpine. here are some lyrics to read through for your enjoyment. 

With his back against the San Francisco traffic,
On the bridges side that faces towards the jail,
Setting out to join a demographic,
He hoists his first leg up over the rail.
And a phone call is made,
Police cars show up quickly.
The sergeant slams his passenger door.
He says, 'Hey son why don't you talk through this with me,
Just tell me what you're doing it for.'

Oh, it's a little bit of everything,

It's the mountains,
It's the fog,
It's the news at six o'clock,
It's the death of my first dog,
It's the angels up above me,
It's the song that they don't sing,
It's a little bit of everything.'

An older man stands in a buffet line,

He is smiling and holding out his plate,
And the further he looks back into his timeline,
That hard road always had led him to today,
And making up for when his bright future had left him,
Making up for the fact that his only son is gone,
And letting everything out once, His server asks him,
Have you figured out yet, what it is you want?

I want a little bit of everything,

The biscuits and the beans,
Whatever helps me to forget about
The things that brought me to my knees,
So pile on those mashed potatoes,
And an extra chicken wing,
I'm having a little bit of everything.

Somewhere a pretty girl is writing invitations,

To a wedding she has scheduled for the fall,
Her man says, 'Baby, can I make an observation?
You don't seem to be having any fun at all.'
She said, 'You just worry about your groomsmen and your shirt-size,
And rest assured that this is making me feel good,
I think that love is so much easier than you realize,
If you can give yourself to someone,
Then you should.

Cause it's a little bit of everything,

The way you choke, the way you ache,
It is waking up before you,
So I can watch you as you wake.
So in the day in late September,
It's not some stupid little ring,

I'm giving a little bit of everything.

 Oh, it's a little bit of everything,

It's the matador and the bull,
It's the suggested daily dosage,
It is the red moon when it's full.

All these psychics and these doctors,

They're all right and they're all wrong,
It's like trying to make out every word,
When they should simply hum along,
It's not some message written in the dark,
Or some truth that no one's seen,
It's a little bit of everything.

I kinda put the entire song, but if you look at the lyrics it describes different moments in peoples lives that all come together and find the beauty in it. So, in essence I figured out that I wanted this book to be "A little bit of everything" I wanted it to be imperfect, I wanted it to be moments captured years ago and some that were present. I wanted the line when Liz says, "Baby, can I make an observation?You don't seem to be having any fun at all.'She said, 'You just worry about your groomsmen and your shirt-size,And rest assured that this is making me feel good,I think that love is so much easier than you realize,If you can give yourself to someone,Then you should." I wanted Merce and Matt to have that. I wanted them only to get married if they want to, and not because I said they had to for the plot. And for myself: I wanted to grow from my book one self and figure out who book two Em was. 

And, so I did, I did find myself crying less(when writing), and not being as attached to Mercedes and Yanelis, but I did kept that care with them. If a chapter didnt work you guys wouldnt see it. If that wasnt something she would say, I would re-write the entire chapter to get the line write. So, my relationship with Mercedes changed because I wasnt god anymore. These were just the consequences of her actions, and "A little bit of everything." 

To conclude, I hope you grew with Mercedes and like I've said to everyone who has read my books, I hope she has brought some closure into your life as she has to mine. 

Heres to "A little bit of everything" and here's to you, for reading this letter, and this fan fiction which is literally just fiction.