I Don't Smoke (bsdxmha)

Bruises can be from many things

"Dude, your neck."

Kaminari's words attract not only the other members of his group but a few stragglers. Dazai finds that more than a few people turn their heads slightly in interest while pretending to be occupied. Within minutes of his arrival, the bruise on his neck is noticed. It goes too far up to cover with bandages, but he had tried. The attention doesn't really bother him anymore. Aizawa can't truly do anything anymore, and even if he did, it would only give away how much he knows.

"Kaminari! How scandalous of you to ask, well..." Dazai smirks. "I'm a bit embarrassed to explain it..."

Kaminari pauses for about a second, then breaks out with a wide grin. Midoriya's face goes bright red when he hears Dazai's sentence from the seat in front of him. The others go from a range of shocked, to impressed, to scared, to inching away from him. Most of them have all congregated near where Midoriya's desk is, and he doesn't have the faintest idea why. People are so ridiculous.

"Dazai! How I know you have your own life outside of school, I must say that it is inappropriate to have visible marks from sexual activities or other things during classroom hours." Iida slightly emphasises 'other things'. He won't meet Dazai's eyes again, from that terrible terrible guilt of his. He knows they're not from sex.

Iida thinks they're from the person who is 'holding him captive', although Dazai doesn't know if that would be a catalyst to tell Aizawa out of worry or reassure him that he can't tell anyone due to Dazai's safety being at risk. He'll probably just ask Dazai about it sometime soon.

"Iida!" Midoriya squeaks. "You shouldn't say that upright. It might be embarrassing for Dazai."

Midoriya is kind, but kindness doesn't get anyone far in the world. Kindness is something that was left in a time before people existed. Was evil founded by human beings? What is evil, anyway?

Dazai doesn't find things like sex embarrassing. Shame doesn't come easily to someone like him about mundane things that teenagers find awkward. His shame is different. Plus, most of the time he's thinking about how to kill himself. No time for anything but death!

"You want the details? Iida... Jealousy isn't a good look on you." Dazai tuts. "Although, if you wanted to do it with me, you could've just asked."

Iida looks rightfully appalled at the comment. Jirou grins at it and whispers something to a slightly pink Yaoyorozu. She still smiles though, even slightly.

"Who even cares what bandaid fetish does in his own time?!" Bakugou interrupts, gripping his pencil with such intensity that Dazai is worried it'll snap in half.

"For someone who doesn't seem to care, you've been listening in on their conversation very intensely." Jirou snickers, barely covering her mouth with her hand. Yaoyorozu sends her a dirty look, but it holds no real value. They both know it by the looks in their eyes.

"It's hard to not listen when half of the damn room is talking about it!" Bakugou snarls back, plenty irritated.

Sex is a big deal to teenagers. He doesn't understand, but he pretends to. It's good for conversation and distraction. Sex is worthless, or it's just a tool.

"I dunno, Bakugou..." Kaminari elbows him and raises both his hands placatingly. "Lies cannot be told..." He pauses. "In the face of this famous detective duo!" Kaminari leans back onto Ashido, crossing their arms. Bakugou looks like he's a second away from exploding. Dazai is sure steam will start to pour out of them any minute now.

"Where did those sunglasses come from...?" Todoroki murmurs quietly at the strange display.

Tokoyami nods understandingly. "Revelry in the dark..."