I Don't Smoke (bsdxmha)

Smoking hunks of metal

Dazai still cannot get himself to like Recovery Girl. Even though she doesn't remind him of Mori at all, he's always been weird about doctors. He can take care of himself.

After the bleeding in his nose comes to an end, she dismisses Dazai from the office and orders him to go back to class. He agrees readily, slinging his bag over his shoulder and dashing out. The hallways are already starting to fill up, which means homeroom is over. Dazai should be able to catch the rest of his class if he hurries along.

He slows his walk as he notices the rest of his classmates walking along in what looks like a line. He's surprised Iida isn't having a hissy fit about it, but instead, he's staring right at Dazai. It's almost degrading, he'd rather kill himself than have to act like a victim. But he's on the verge of being found out. The best thing to do was guilt Iida to keep it a secret, or else he wouldn't let it go and would tell his brother and others. Killing him was also not an option- they'd figure out it was him from some of the security cameras.

Iida isn't the only one looking at him though- Aizawa is also staring at him. He's noticed it over the past few days, but it's starting to bug him. If he had to say, it might be guarded. Or suspicious. Or pitying. He goes through the possibility that he somehow found out about the school files, but scraps it. Dazai doesn't make mistakes when it comes to work.

And so he makes his way to the line, walking with everyone else and ignoring Iida's persistent gaze. Every time he makes eye contact with the boy he makes sure to sadden his eyes slightly and tug his mouth into a grimace. Iida catches up with the group.

"Good morning everyone! I hope you are all well rested and prepared for another day of class!"

"Are you well rested? You almost came to class late!!!" Uraraka exclaims, clutching his forearm.

Iida looks to the side, and quickly to Dazai. Almost like he's begging for a cover. Well, Dazai won't help him.

"Yeah Class Prez, I'm shocked. I could have sworn that a few days ago you were yabbering on about tardiness.." He quickly agrees with her and puts his arm around Iida's shoulders. He doesn't miss how his usually stiff shoulders tense up. In fact, he seems to be avoiding eye contact, from the way his eyes are shuffling between Midoriya and Uraraka.

Usually, he hates physical contact. The only reason he initiates it is to seem normal: If human beings center themselves with touch and physical connection to other people, he will follow like a baby trailing their mothers. He can only copy what others do to try and delude himself into his humanity.

The simple fact is that he craves it so badly that it repulses him.

A deep seated repulsion of himself rather than anybody else that he can't fathom being close to someone; emotionally or physically. Nobody but Father dared to lay their hands on his distorted self. He begged, prayed so hard for someone to love him. And at the end of that thin delusion he was marching on, he sank. Nobody can be heard at the bottom of the ocean. Nothing matters when you're drowning. It's a mind numbing nothingness. Dying must be better than pathetically attempting to gasp for air that doesn't exist in the ocean.

Everyone drowns eventually.

Iida pauses, meticulously trying to figure out what to say in response to the questioning. Even in a situation like this, he wouldn't want to lie.

Dazai really only picked this little bunch to hang out with because Midoriya's quirk was suspicious at the start of the year. Now that he's got confirmation, he's going to try to get the boy himself to open up to him through trust. The other two were useless to him at first, but now that the gravity girl is one of the potential suspects of the traitor, he's had to pay closer attention to her. And Iida has been added to the mix of people he has to keep a closer eye on. What a tiring group.