The Wondering Mind

late nights

I stay up far to late night after night. I think and think until I finally collapse exhausted from the running my mind has done for the better part of the night. I say I'm tired and I am I'm worn down to the bone and if that was a legitimate statement I'm doubt full id have any meat left on this body of mine. I run constantly never stopping long enough to break. the loneliness creeps in the shadows of my mind haunting me with its presence so, I never stop never slow always around someone even on the days when being around other people drains me more than anything else.

It is too much to be alone again. see loneliness itself is an addiction and I know full well how attached I become to my own company. I recede back into myself and the four walls of a cage I call my room would be the only things to see me anymore. its peaceful and yet chilling to be left to your own devices for to long.

peace is a rare find these days. my life would be rebuilt by these four walls I would fall back into my age old routine of work, home, work, home. Time is just an obstacle keeping me from home and chaining me to work I would become a shell again. my body simply a hollow host hoarding a soul who bids its time secluded from life.

I am far to comfortable being alone. I have made it almost a habit to find ways not to be on my own. I rather my own company as opposed to most people. Some see that as an insult others understand. I find it to be odd to be a species built on social interaction I spend most of my time preferring to be alone.

few people are inside what has been referred to as my bubble, they are the ones I don mind being around longer than others, however; I still tire out from their presence as well.

My sister must not have lied I have become quite the introvert especially if I allow myself the opportunity to be one.