Accidental Infidelity (Heartbreak Diary #1)

Kabanata 26

Kabanata 26

Accidental Infidelity

"Because the only thing I want from Ryker Baltazar is you, Lieve," he confessed, stepping closer.

Ramdam ko ang intensidad ng kaniyang tingin sa akin na hindi ko kayang tagpuin iyon.

"Hindi naman ako bagay na kailangan mong kunin sa iba. I'm not someone's property. I'm not even Ryker's."

"You aren't, but he's everything for you."

He's got a point...but it's meaningless now. Hindi ko na mundo si Ryker. He was...once, but now, I am living my own life without any traces of him.

I stepped back, his hand still holding mine. Bumaba ang tingin ko sa kamay niyang nakahawak pa rin sa akin. His hand felt warm against mine, like an approaching summer to a cold season.

So...the reason why he was helping me was because I caught his attention, huh?

Diego Valmorida likes me.

As if he could read my mind, he spoke, saying, "You're cousin caught my intentions so fast. She knew I have feelings for you when we were in Cebu."

Feelings, huh. I've never had someone confess to me before. Siguro ay dahil wala naman talagang espesyal sa akin o baka na rin nakikita nilang hindi kami mahiwalay ni Ryker noon. Even so, nobody was brave enough to tell me that they like me or that they admire me as a girl.

"So you helped me because you like me..." I whispered.

"You didn't need the help but I want to. Your cousin told me you've always vowed your time for Ryker and that you never had time for yourself. You don't look happy anymore. At least, that's what I saw."

Napangiti ako, ang tingin ay nasa kamay pa rin naming dalawa. My index finger moved and he caught it. He hooked his finger with mine, like an anchor to an anchor, not ready to let go. Sa isip ko, alam kong gusto niya ang pinsan ko, but now that I think about it...Diego Valmorida has always been on my mind ever since I met him up close. The first time I heard his name, I got curious about him—why Ryker likes him, and why everyone wants his attention. Ang akala ko ba suplado siya kaya bakit gusto siya ng lahat? Now, I realize it's because he was warm even when his presence was quite intimidating. He was kind. He lets me breathe whenever I'm with him. He was smart and funny. Now that I think about it...I really enjoyed my time with him. The dinner, midnight emails, the art exhibit stroll...I really enjoyed all of them. Sinadya niya ba ang mga iyon o nagkataon lang?

When did he have feelings for me? And why does it feel like all this time...ever since I met him, I kept thinking about him? Even when I felt like I love Ryker, I was slowly getting swept away by this man.

My loyalty and love lies on Ryker. I thought my conviction was firm enough for me to not like someone else. Ngunit nagkamali ako. Sa isang iglap, nawala ang atensyon ko kay Ryker. Someone caught my attention while I was struggling to find my reasons to love Ryker more...to believe and wait for his promise. Those moments with Diego made me realize that I was worth more than Ryker's abrupt and uncertain promise.

Kaya madali lang para sa akin na tanggapin ang kinahinatnan namin ni Ryker dahil unti-unti na akong lumalayo. I've never realized it...not until now. Nangako nga ako kay Ryker noon pero unti-unti naman akong inilalayo ng pagkakataon sa kaniya para lang makilala ko ang katulad ni Diego. I tied myself to Ryker but someone removed that knot because Ryker doesn't really deserve me. Maybe I don't really have to devote myself for someone to appreciate me.

"I'm not going to convince you to move on from him. I want you to take your time. You don't have to like me back, Lieve."

"I don't even know what to say," I said to him, lifting my eyes to stare at his face. Diego held a gentle smile. Mas naramdaman ko ang hatak niya sa akin gamit ang kaniyang daliri.