𝗜𝗻𝘀𝗲𝗽𝗮𝗿𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲 - joão félix

40

when we reached the hotel, everyone was exhausted - and without talking, everybody left to get some sleep and shower. the way up to our room was very quiet, but i didn't dare break the silence. joão was in a bad mood and i understood to not talk to him and make him feel even worse.

he opened the door as we both walked in - and joão headed straight towards the bathroom to shower.

i sighed and fell straight onto my bed, i couldn't believe that portugal had come this far into the world cup and now they'd lost. all the headlines were celebrating the win of morocco but portugal was feeling so disappointed right now. i close my eyes and think about what would happen tomorrow when we went back to portugal - my aunt and uncle were still in england so i had to stay with joão.

i felt myself drift off thinking about everything.

-

i open my eyes and i'm now leaning against joão's chest, he's scrolling on his phone (on tiktok i presume) and he looks very focused, and when he meets my eye he puts the phone down and smiles.

"hey," he speaks softly, but i can hear the pain in his voice. and then his smile drops with a guilty look replacing it, "i'm sorry."

"you don't need to apologise," i smile. "i understand, you were in a bad mood so don't worry."

he brings me closer and hugs me.

"enough about me, how are you feeling?" i ask worriedly.

"i could be a lot better," he sighs. "i'm not sad though, we played well but morocco played better. and at the end of the day the only thing that's important is that we tried."

"wise words," i joke, "but yeah you're completely right, you guys did your best, and thats what matters."

"i really don't deserve you.." he smiles. "did i tell you i love you?"

"twice actually." i say. "but i love you more,"

he kissed my forehead gently, "you can't, that's impossible. i love you the most."

"not more than i love you,"

"nope, i love you even more."

"i-"

"-shush." he whispers and cuts me off my slamming his lips against mine. "i will literally close your mouth if you say that again."

"okay but-" i start before he places his hand on my mouth. i put his hand down and laugh. "chill i was just going to say that i was hungry."

"oh where do you want to go?" he asks. "actually i know a place for a picky eater like you,"

"shut up," i say jokingly and push him while i get up.

joão grabs my wrist and pulls me back onto him with a smirk on his face.

"we're literally dating how are you still getting nervous?" he teased.

"it's so hard not to be nervous when you look at me like that," i admit.

"you're right. i just got that type of rizz," he laughs.

this time i actually get off him and scoff jokingly. "don't get so full of yourself."

-

after we got changed we started to walk to the restaurant, thankfully it was close so we got there very quickly, the waiter took us to our table and gave us two menus.

i gasp excitedly. "they've got strips!"

"that's why i took you here silly," he smiles.

at that moment the waiter comes over and he gives me a friendly/flirty smile.

"what can i get for you?" he asks while looking specifically at me - even though i'm not looking at joão i can still see him practically shooting death glares at the waiter.

joão doesn't speak so i do, "uh can i get the strips meal please?"

the waiter writes it down on a paper and turns to face joão with a bored expression. "anything for you?"

"no thank you." joão says plainly but it sounds passive aggressive. "actually can we get that as takeout?"

the waiter breathes out in annoyance but smiles "yes, of course. just one second."

when he walks away i burst out laughing, joão still looks serious though

"are you jealous?"

"of course i am," he scoffs. "i don't think people understand that you're mine, and i'm not sharing."

before i respond the waiter comes back with the food in a bag and joão pays the bill. we both leave and joão scrunches up the receipt with some writing on it.

"what did he write?" i ask curiously, talking about the waiter.

"don't worry about it."

-

when we get back to the hotel i change into my pyjama's and eat my food, joão insists he isn't hungry so i don't force him to have some, he soon falls asleep so i just watch tiktok on my phone for a while.

which reminds me to check something.

i look up the latest news and all i can see are dramatic headlines saying, 'joão félix and kevin alvarez fight over eleanor silva.' or 'who is eleanor silva?"

i click on the link and it brings me to a page full of information about me that i have no idea how they got.

it included my mothers and fathers full names and the name of my younger sister, my height, who i use to date and a picture of me when i was younger.

so fucking creepy..

i switch my phone off and ponder for a moment - about my life, and definitely about my decisions.

i hate being stuck in my guilty thoughts alone.

maybe i wasn't cut out for this, for being a wag, for being famous, for being joão félix's girlfriend. would he care if i left? would he care if i stopped caring?

i look over to joão sleeping peacefully on his bed. he looks so beautiful and i wonder if he's actually genuine when he says he loves me

i also know that worse things are going to come.

crazy fan girls aren't my main priority but penny was nothing compared to the rest. i've already seen people cussing me out online for literally doing nothing but existing.

no, i need to stop overthinking.

i clear my mind and get into bed with joão and cuddle close to him.

portugal tomorrow.

-

guys i acc updated 😥
it's like 2 am but i literally could not write this chapter but yeah 👍 sorry for the mini hiatus