Learn to Love Again

Blameless

Tom sat down next to Jenny and burst into tears. They'd found Jamie. Physically he was fine, mentally? Not so much. He'd escaped from the "Uncle" not long after he'd realised it wasn't someone his mum even knew let alone was related to. The problem was he'd gone into hiding. And now, even for a police officer, he wouldn't come out. All he did was scream.

"He'd in a shed, behind the school. We found him about twenty minutes ago. The first time officers tried the door, it seemed to be locked, that's why we moved on while we waited for the keyholder. When the door was opened, we found him, hiding behind a large water tank. Just out of reach. He won't come anywhere near us. We need you Mr Hiddleston, we need you to come and persuade him we are who we say we are. He quite simply doesn't believe he's safe."

Tom nodded, wiping his eyes, he turned to Jenny. "Come on love, let's go get our boy." he stood and held out his hand. Jenny stared glassily at him, barely able to comprehend what was happening. They'd found him? Really and truly found him?

"He's alive?" she whispered, looking at Tom and Diana with terror on her face "he's ok?"

"Yes love, he's ok but he needs us. He needs his mum. He's scared." Tom bent down and stroked her cheek "I'm scared love. I need you too." he kissed her and she looked at him with the tiniest smile.

"Let's get our JJ" she said in a small voice. Diana smiled and hugged them both before they left.

"Come back soon son" she crushed Tom to her, "well done, I'm so proud of you. You did so well."

To Jenny she simply smiled and kissed her cheek. Looking at her, she said softly "You're all going to be ok. I promise. And if anyone had ANY doubt about how much you love Jamie, today has proved that you ARE his mum. Every inch of you is devoted to that little boy. I'm so proud of you too. Now go" she shooed them out the door "Bring back your son to his Granny"

The police car took them away and Diana turned to the family liaison officer Karen, who still sat on the sofa, ready to deal with the aftermath.

"This is the hard bit isn't it?" she said sadly "This is where the guilt begins."

"Sadly you're right Mrs Hiddleston, all we can do is be here for them. It's going to get a whole lot worse before it gets better."

The village watched with baited breath as Tom and Jenny and the detective entered the shed. On the way, people were standing in their gardens, at their windows, gathered at the school. This had shocked them to the core. Tom and his family, they thought, had always been safe here. Now, they realised, nowhere was safe. Even if you weren't a celebrity. Doors would be locked tonight, children watched carefully. It was as if the innocence of the community had been taken away.

The shed was gloomy and damp. In one corner a large metal tank - the water tank - was providing shelter for a terrified little boy. If only his Dad would come and get him. All these people were trying to trick him. There was no Uncle, there was no Policeman there was only Dad. And mum. Where was his mum? Why had the man said he was her brother? What had he wanted to do with him? He'd held his hand and told him to be quiet. That he was taking him somewhere to meet his mum as a surprise.

Now, Jamie knew not to go with strangers, knew that he should run and tell if anyone approached him. But this man, he'd been so nice. He'd had a photo of his mum. Said she'd given it to him and that showed he was his Uncle. He'd been so real. So Jamie, wanting to surprise his mum with flowers, had agreed. It wasn't until just walked straight past the supermarket, walked past the garage and started to grip his wrist tightly that he'd got scared.

When the man had stopped at a car, and briefly let go his hand to open the door, Jamie had sprinted. As far and as fast as he could. The man yelled at him and started to run after him. His terrified little mind could only think to hide. He was near the school still. He knew there were places to hide. Till his Dad could come to get him. They sometimes hid there playing hide and seek and her was VERY good at hide and seek. Pulling a couple of slats aside in the wooden wall, he squished in and then behind the tank. From his hiding place, he could see the man's legs as he passed. At first quickly, searching, then leaving more slowly, talking in a soft voice.

"I'm sorry I got angry Little Man" he said "I just didn't want you ruining the surprise! You have to come with me, I need you to come with me. We need to surprise your Mum." he paused and Jamie thought he'd been discovered. He held his breath and covered his eyes. Silence. Then the sound of the man walking away. When Jamie uncovered his eyes, he was gone. He couldn't come out though. He had to have his Dad. Or his mum. Only they would tell him the truth. Only they could rescue him. He curled up into a little ball and cried. Dad would find him. Mum would find him. He fell asleep.

He woke to the sound of the door being unlocked. Instantly he shrank back into the shadows. The man had come back! After a minute or two, a face appeared round the edge of the tank.

"Sarge! He's here! SARGE I FOUND HIM!"

People and voices and lights surrounded him. He covered his head with his hands and wouldn't look at them. One tried to reach in for him and he screamed loudly. They shrank back, not wanting to traumatise him any further.

"It's ok Jamie, we're the police. You're safe."

"NOOOOO GO AWAY. YOU'RE LIARS YOURE ALL LIARS NOOOOOOO" He covered his head again and refused to move. They couldn't reach him where he had squashed in and he felt safe. "DAAAAAAAAD MUUUUUUUUMM"

"Go get them, NOW!" a more familiar voice said. Jamie was almost sure it was PC Dixon but he was too scared to be sure. Nothing seemed right in his world any more. Nothing. He looked at the officer but shook his head. Mute now. PC Dixon sat down.

"I'm not going to leave you Jamie, they've gone to get your Dad. You'll be ok son." he said softly.

Jamie just shook his head and cowered down. It was all too much.

"JJ - it's me JJ, it's Dad" the voice made him look up. In a second he was out from behind the tank and in his father's arms. They cried almost as much as each other. Tom hoisted him into his arms and walked back out into the daylight with him. There was a gentle cheer from the bystanders that had gathered and Jamie clung on, face buried in Tom's neck. He hadn't spoken. Not a single word.

As they came outside, Tom looked at the woman standing in front of them, tears coursing down her face, a smile splitting it in two. "Look who else is here JJ" he whispered and JJ twisted round. Tom dropped him onto his feet and he ran as fast as his little legs could go. Jenny was on her knees before he reached her, arms outstretched.

"Mum please don't be angry and please don't leave" it tumbled out in a tear and snot filled rush as he clung round her neck.

"Oh JJ my darling boy, you have nothing to be sorry for. You did nothing wrong. Nothing at all." she hugged and kissed him and looked up at Tom as he came and knelt with them. "You're safe and that's all we care about."

Tom wrapped his arms around the pair of them and hugged them tightly. "come on, let's go home." he gently stood, bringing them with him. "Time to go and see Granny. She's waiting for you too."

They walked back to the police car and climbed in. JJ holding their hands tightly. He didn't speak again. As they drove home, he sat silently watching as his Dad and Mum looked at him then each other, smiling fit to burst.

He ran into the house and into the arms of his Granny. He still said nothing. He just looked and cried and when she asked him if he would like something to eat, he shook his head. For a moment he looked around the living room then without a word, ran upstairs and slammed his room door behind him.

When the Police left, when the commotion was over, Diana and Jenny sat in the kitchen talking and Tom went upstairs to see JJ. At first he couldn't see him, then he had a thought and looked under his bed. There, snuggled up to his favourite teddy, the sleeping form of the little boy could be seen. Tom's heart broke. His precious boy was still scared. Leaving him to sleep for the moment, he went back downstairs.

"Is he ok?" Diana asked quietly, an exhausted and emotionally drained Jenny now sound asleep on the sofa beside her.

"No, I don't think he is mum. And I don't know how to help him." he replied, tears in his eyes again. "I feel so useless. Again."

"Don't worry son, children are resilient. And if anyone knows how to get into the mind of a seven year old, I think you'll find you have an expert here." she smiled and took his hand as she looked at the sleeping form next to her.

What Diana didn't know, couldn't know, is it would be a long time before anyone got into the mind of the scared little boy upstairs and it would test them to the limit in the process.