Music Sheet (Harry Styles)

Chapter 34 ~ Hannah

Chapter 34 ~ Hannah

  

He is downstairs but I don’t know what to do. Savannah left the moment she knew Harry was coming and I swear, he teleported here. I thought I was going to have a bit of time to get ready, but he didn’t give me more than seven minutes. How did he do that?

I look at myself in the mirror but I feel like I’m doing something wrong. I’m so nervous, I don’t know how I’m going to apologise and ask him to put all this behind, to forget my awful behaviour all this time. But what happens after that? Will he still want to be more than friends? Do I want the same?

I sigh deeply and I look at my reflection one more time. Skinny jeans with boots, a jumper that reaches below half of my tights, a green scarf with a greet wool hat and my coat. I’m only wearing mascara and a tiny bit of eyeliner, but I’m afraid it’s too much. I feel so self-conscious about it and I try telling myself that I shouldn’t care that much, I’m just going for a coffee with him to apologise. It’s not a date.

I leave my room after saying goodbye to Hope and when I come back to the living room, he is still waiting for me, keeping himself busy by watching all the frames with pictures we have above the fireplace. He doesn’t hear me when I walk in until I speak.

“That’s my favourite,” I say catching him off guard when he is looking at a picture we took when we went to visit some relatives when I was eight. Mum and Dad were with me while I was on the swing under the tree with a huge smile, laughing as Dad kept pushing me to go faster and faster whilst Mums seemed really scared something could happen to me. Nothing happened, but when I got down, she didn’t let go of my hand until we left. In the picture I’m going really high, Dad is laughing as well and Mum seems about to have a breakdown. I just love that picture of those happy times.

“Hannah,” he blurts out turning around to meet my eyes. His cheeks are flushed with embarrassment for catching him looking at the pictures. “I didn’t mean to pry, I just––”

“It’s okay,” I tell him with a smile. “The pictures are there to see. That’s my Mum,” I tell him next and he focuses his attention on the picture again.

“She looks a lot like you,” Harry comments and I smile feeling that heavy heartbeat again.

“Dad says the same, but I’m not anything like her. She was so brave, so caring and selfless but I am not.” Harry turns around, his eyes showing concern and disagreement with what I’ve said, so before he can add something else, I say, “Shall we go? I really need some air.”

Harry nods and I lead him to the door. It’s snowing and it’s bloody cold, so he rushes to his car and he is using the Range Rover today. No one is outside, but he still drives carefully as we leave my neighbourhood and we head to the coffee shop that is near the garage. During the ride, I don’t say anything. I’m still trying to find the words in my head and the courage to say them out loud. It’s harder than it seems, I can tell you that. Mum always said I was stubborn and that it’s hard for me to accept when I’ve done something wrong, and even harder to apologise, but I know it’s what I have to do now.

We finally get to the coffee shop and we rush inside where only a handful of costumers are around. As usual, we order two coffees and biscuits and we take the farthest table where we can have some privacy. Until someone comes with our order, I don’t say anything. Harry is staring at me, waiting.

“I– I’m sorry, Harry. I’ve been so awful and slapping you wasn’t okay. You’re helping me so much and the first time you do something wrong, I hit you. That’s not okay, it wasn’t necessary and I’m really, really sorry,” I blurt out but when I hear my words, they don’t make much sense to me.