Chapter 30: Ante

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The first two meetings between Ethan and his potential adoptive family went very well. Ethan was still shy around them and mostly talked with Martha but she was great at making him feel more at ease. Today, I had another meeting with Mr. Collins and I was planning to present my idea to him about organizing a small vacation all together. I was sure it would manage to bring them closer and the only thing I needed was Mr. Collins' blessing.

I greeted the secretary and walked up to his office. I knocked and entered, shaking his hand. "So, what is so important that couldn't be said through the phone?" He asked as soon as I sat in the armchair in front of him.

"As you know, so far things are going well with Ethan and the Mattel family. He mostly talks to Martha even if he's still shy and I was thinking that bringing them to a holiday would be beneficial. I honestly think it could make Ethan open a little more."

"You want to bring them on a holiday? Where? When? How?" He asked, trying to process what I just said.

"Yes. I would need to speak to the Mattel but, if possible, we could organize this during Ethan's next school holidays. I would pay for everyone, you don't have to worry about this."

"I see, I see... And where would that holiday be?"

"I was thinking we could go on a cruise? My partner and Ethan seems to share a love for water and boats and I don't think the Mattel would mind at all."

"And you would pay a holiday on a cruise for five people? Just to get Ethan to warm up more with this couple?" He asked suspiciously. "You know how expensive cruises are, right?"

"I do." I nodded before explaining. "And yes, I would do this if it could bring them closer. From all the couples we met, this is the first one that seems perfect for him."

"I still don't understand why you would need to go on a holiday with everyone. Holidays are supposed to be family events. And, sorry if this hurts, but Ethan is not a part of your family. To me, it seems like it would only make things harder for you and your partner once he will leave your care."

I closed my eyes slightly, knowing he would bring this up again sooner or later. "I know. My partner and I understood that we won't be able to adopt him. I'm not going to lie and tell you this doesn't hurt a little but it is what it is. I won't cry or beg you for you to change your mind, I know it would be pointless. But, in the end, this isn't important. The most important person in this story is Ethan. And I want the best for him. I really do. And I think this family would be perfect for him. Martha is such a kind and warm woman. She always have the right words to make him smile or make him open a little more. And Jonathan is a calm and gentle man. He's a man with values and a strong work ethic who does the best he can for the people he cares about." I took a deep breath before saying the last part in a softer voice. "I love Ethan, I really do. This family is everything he deserves."

He looked at me for a minute, not saying anything. I did my best not to lower my eyes and show him that I really meant what I just said. My heart was beating like crazy in my chest and I was glad that I was sitting so he couldn't see my hands shaking. What I just said... It hadn't been easy. We had been beating around the bush for a while but now he knew that we would have liked to adopt him if this was possible.

"You have my consent for that holiday as long as Ethan doesn't miss school and that the orphanage doesn't have to pay for anything. We couldn't afford it anyway and it wouldn't be fair for all of the children here."

"Thank you." 

We shook hands and I left right after. We talked about everything we needed to talk. As I left the building, I looked at the sky getting slightly darker. The weather was better and a slight jacket was all I needed. The conversation kept replaying in my head as I walked back home. Deep inside, I knew that if this holiday went as planned, it wouldn't be long before Ethan left. Before the end of the year, that was for sure. My heart squeezed painfully at this thought and I tried to direct my thoughts in another direction. Maybe this would be the occasion for another trip with Nazar. Just him and I in a foreign country. It had been a while since we had done that and it couldn't be a bad thing to concentrate on ourselves a little. 

My mood was lifted as soon as I stepped into the kitchen and I was met with the sight of Ethan and Nazar laughing together. "What are you doing?" I asked as I stepped closer and saw Ethan had his reading book open in front of him.

"I'm teaching Nazar how to read!" Ethan exclaimed while Nazar chuckled silently.

"Oh, and you think you will be able to teach him while learning how to read yourself? Smart." I replied with a smile.

"I'm doing what I learnt today! He's doing great, do you want to see one?" He asked, turning his head back toward his little book.

"Sure!"

He put one of his fingers under the first word and started to spell the word slowly. "The letters are C, A and T... Which word is it?" He raised his eyes back to Nazar and waited for his answer.

Nazar pretend to think for a second before answering. "Cat?"

Ethan looked back at his book, his finger following the letter to check if it was correct. It was adorable. "That's right!! C-A-T is cat!"

"I'm impressed." I said, a genuine smile on my face. This was something I didn't expect.

"One day, he will be able to read normal books." Ethan added with another excited smile.

"And will you be the one spelling the letters so he can read these books?"

He paused for a minute until his eyes widened slightly, realizing what I just said. "Of course! But you can help him when I'm busy with other things, if you want."

"Looks like he thought about everything." Nazar laughed, walking closer to me. "Hope you will free your schedule for me, I have tons of book I want to read." He added, kissing my cheek.

"Why don't you two continue while I prepare dinner?"

Ethan nodded energetically and put his finger on another word. "Ready? Okay. A-N-T."

"This one is easy! Ante!" He answered with a smirk, making me roll my eyes.

"No!" Ethan laughed, looking at me quickly. When he saw that I was smiling and shaking my head softly, he laughed again. "A-N-T is Ant!!"

Nazar made a 'O' with his mouth before laughing a little. It was easy to see that he was enjoying this and that Ethan was really believing he was teaching him how to read. I decided to make a quiche Lorraine, a meal from my childhood region in France with a salad on the side. As I was waiting for it to finish cooking, I continued to watch Ethan and Nazar interact. I was glad that their relationship was great again. It hadn't been easy to make him understand with child friendly terms that my relationship with Nazar was totally different than the relationship he used to have with his parents, especially his father. But I was thankful for the numerous cartoons I found that helped me explain the situation.

The mood was great as we ate dinner. As soon as Nazar and I were alone, I told him how the conversation with Mr. Collins went. 

"So, we're really going on a cruise? All of us?" He asked, a small smile on his face.

"Yes. I still need to ask when the Mattel would be free but it should happen during Ethan's next holidays. I will let you know once I booked everything."

"I can't believe we've never been on a cruise before... I can't wait."

"If everything goes as planned, it will probably be our last holidays and weeks with Ethan." I admitted after a few seconds with a heavy heart.

He didn't answer but took my hand into his and squeezed it softly. Knowing that I had him at my sides and that I could count on him was enough. I knew that even if things wouldn't be easy, we would help each other to overcome this...








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