So Crazy In Love (Divergent Eric)

Chapter 11: I Know

For the next week I ignored Eric. Trust me it was harder than you can imagine. Every time he attempted to even speak to me, I was out of his presence, attempting to look occupied. My days played out simple. I went to work to train the initiates and went home at the end of the day. I spoke to mainly Four when it came to training subjects and busied myself with training. It was the middle of week three and the initiates were moving through training well. When I had breaks, I stuck my nose in my journal. I had written down every fact thus far that I had found out about my parents. I was trying to come to the best conclusion that I could before asking more questions of my step-parents. I had the urge to go to Amity but I knew I was being looked at harder every day. The fact that Max stated that I had a set purpose while I was here bothered me. I couldn't do anything out of the ordinary. I scribbled away at some pages after we let the initiates leave for lunch. I wasn't hungry. I had lost my appetite for everything.

"Avery?" I looked up from my seat on the bench next to the score board. Tris. She gave a small smile and took a seat next to me. "Are you ok?" She asked bluntly and I turned to her. My hands closed the journal and set it to the side.

"Yes." I said simply and looked around the training area. Four and Eric were sharing a conversation in the corner of the room. I wanted to know about what but I pushed my thought from it. I had to try a new tactic to gain my full leadership potential. Maybe not being nosey would be a good start.

"You don't really seem like it." Tris stated and at that moment Jessica appeared. She had been around more and more the last week. I told myself to push the jealous feeling aside. I had done this to myself. Eric gave up after day two on my cold shoulder tactics and Jessica took advantage of that. I turned to Tris.

"Trust me, I am fine." Something was in the works, I knew it. I had detached myself from everything. The leadership, the Erudite program, and Eric. Tris stared at me for a moment before glancing over at Four, Eric, and Jessica. I looked to the ground trying to ignore Tris's presence. I wasn't fine. She was a smart girl and could read that. Eric kept secrets from me, my thoughts of being used in some way flooded back.

"I'll see you after the break." She said and left me sitting alone on the bench. I needed a break from life at this point. Looking up I watch Four and Jessica leave the training area. They were locked in conversation. My eyes landed on Eric who was looking back at me. My hand found my journal and gripped it tightly. I wanted so badly to run to him. Hug him and kiss him. Apologize for everything. There were two sides of him. Why couldn't he be consistent? Was the Eric I was falling for the real, true Eric, or just a figment of him? I stood from the bench and left the training area out the back entrance. I had an hour to kill. I needed to find some more answers but had no outlets. I couldn't go the Erudite, Jeanine would find me and make it more awkward than it needed to be. Amity was beyond out of the question. I sighed and began to wonder around the compound. My fingers flipped through pages and my mind continued to process the information. I found myself in the archive. My feet had led me there against my will.

Erudite had cleaned it out completely. It was comical that a desk still lay in the center of the room and the old woman who kept the archive sat behind it. She was typing away at her computer. I walked up to her desk and waited for her too look up at me. She had quickly closed some screens on her computer before looking up at me.

"How can I help you dear?" She asked and smiled up at me. Her face was scarred badly. She hid it well underneath her blonde hair. I smiled the best happy smile I could. "You are bothered by something." She stated, not asked. How could everyone tell? Maybe it was a woman thing. I sat down in the chair that sat in front of her desk. My journal folded in my lap.

"You are the second person to see that today." I said and brushed my hair out of my face. I had been wearing it down. I wanted it to cover the piercings on my eyebrow. My blonde roots were coming back in. I had to see Tori later to fix that. "I'm sorry I never got your name." I blurted out realizing I only knew her as the archive keeper.