MY JOURNEY HOME: 2022

o. Write it down

It's a new day, a new week, the last week of June. First half down, so quickly, like a thief in the night.
How I am feeling is nothing short of unsettled. I shouldn't feel defeated or beaten because God is with me and yet I do. Did I put an unwise expectation on the universe hence the feeling of being let down? Who or what am I disappointed in, and who permitted me to put expectations on anyone or anything outside of me? Who do I have to blame really, and is blaming what I want to do?
Why am I finding it hard to embrace the truth that I know so well? I know that God is with me and yet I fret. I know that I shouldn't worry and yet I do. I know that God knows best and yet still unsettled.
I feel like the Christian who hears the word, takes in the word and yet immediately they face any challenge the word disappears into thin air. I need to do better to maintain my energy and vibrations high. I'm not trying to go down so then higher we aim.
Dear Lord, I've not been a good listening Christian this week, forgive me oh Lord. I know your will for my life is perfect, I know that all things work well for me, so help me lord to walk in that truth. Help me to recognize your presence and your works Holy Spirit in my life. I feel like by me knowing better I should be doing better than this. I also know Lord that I am fallen and it's your Grace, that lives not I. There's nothing good that can be found in me were it not for your goodness that encompasses me.
I've not been reflecting on Jesus in my life recently, I have allowed fears to sip out of me, forgive me, Lord. Help me do better.
My father in heaven, you know what I need better than I'll ever do, you created me. I am more often than not led by my fleshly desires which are contrary to your will. Take charge Holy Spirit, and don't let sin overrun me. Direct my steps towards my destiny oh Lord, lest I wander in the wilderness longer than I ought to.
And yet, in the end, it's the Lord's purpose that prevails. Your will and not mine oh Lord. I know you're working in the background, l know you fight my battles that am not even aware of. I could be desiring destruction unconsciously. Your will and not mine oh Lord.
Thank you for who you are Lord because you're good all the time. Thank you for being love, agape love. Pure and Holy, loving all the time. Thank you because nothing can separate us from your love. Jesus, you gave your life for us and paid the price. Help us/me oh Lord to walk in that perfect grace reflecting Jesus and not our/my selfish ambitions.
Everything is possible with you Lord. I pray this in the name of Jesus, who was given to us/me believing and trusting in the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, Amen.