what happens after school - creek

Woah There!! Slow Your Roll!!!!

Did I weird him out by putting friendship into different levels? That's just how my brain works! I put everything into categories!

Does he hate me? Did he not actually have fun on Saturday? Was I stupid for assuming we were getting closer?

I close my eyes tighter but these thoughts are still in my head

God. I'm so embarrassed! What if I was just annoying him and keeping him away from his alone time? What if he genuinely liked being alone and didn't want to change that but was to polite to tell me?

I open my phone.

It's 1:17 A.M.

Perfect.

I shut my eyes and try to put my mind at ease

...

Im awoken by the sound of my alarm. Perfect. Exactly what I wanted. To be awake.

I get dressed and do whatever and yadda yadda

That's not important right now. What's important is my inner conflict

I felt really bad and guilty for some reason. Even though I did nothing wrong. He always seems to unintentionally make me feel guilty over nothing.
I honestly and genuinely don't know how he does this. Why do I feel this way with just him?

I'm kind of pissed off about it to be honest

These thoughts came and went as I got to my third hour

I forgot about my third hour

I took my seat next to him. Nothing felt too out of place..

But still something felt off.

"So you're still eating lunch with us right?" I finally ask

"Hm? Oh, uh" he stutters out "do you want me to?"

I laugh to myself "yeah that's why I asked you to"

He just gives a weak laugh

I want to ask him if he even still wanted to because it seemed like he didn't

But I was interrupted by the teacher talking

Something changed. I wasn't certain of it before but now I am. It feels like I'm back at square one. It feels like I'm back at that awkward joke I made in science class when we first started talking outside of the club.
All that work I did to make it not awkward and weird to be partners for the club is lost and I don't know why. I really wish I knew why.

I do my work and enjoy reading the textbook for the rest of the 72 minutes.

Then lunch came.

"After you" I hold the door in front of him and try to make him laugh but it doesn't work

Clyde comes from his classroom and we all start walking together. Clyde makes a few dumbass jokes which make Tweek slowly start laughing again

Maybe he was just in a bad mood that was unrelated to me

We finally get to our table and the whole gang is there.

Expect Tweek sat in between me and jimmy.

Tweek is a little awkward but that was to be expected

Clyde is talking his ear off despite initially not wanting him here.

"Do you play video games?" Clyde asks

"Uh, yeah sometimes" Tweek says

"More to the point, do you play the Witcher?"

Tweek softly smiles "I love the Witcher"

Clyde immediately freaks out "holy fucking shit I love the Witcher" he starts shaking Tolkien

"Oh my god! Oh my god okay, so Yennifer or Triss? And there is a correct answer to this so be careful" Clyde asks

"Yennifer, obviously"

Clyde starts cheering

"Yes! You have my approval, thank god you're cool"

Tweek stops laughing when he hears this but no one acknowledges it. Not out loud anyways

I feel a pit in my stomach like something bad is going to happen.
I should go to the bathroom and splash water on my face

"I'm gonna go take a leak" I say as I get up

I go to the bathroom and just stare at myself for a good 20 seconds. Why do I feel so.... Anxious? Everything is going well

Who cares if Tweek is in a bad mood? That's not my problem. It shouldn't be my problem. Why do I make it my problem

I splash water on my face and try to get ahold of myself

I liked life a lot more when I had the same three emotions on repeat everyday.

I get back to the table and something has clearly changed

Tweek is no where to be seen.

the boys are all looking to their right with horrified faces

"What happened?"

They all turn to me