𝐄𝐳𝐫𝐚 | 18+

01

I gaze up at the stars and the moon, admiring how perfectly they fit together. I've always loved the night. The stars are my favorite part of the night, they look like freckles that decorate the dark sky.

The darkness alone would be sad and depressing, but with the stars and Moon, it has a particular value. Another positive aspect of the night, is that there's nobody to bother me. I could stare at a wall for hours without anyone questioning me. I'm quite a talkative person, actually, but everyday I need to be alone or just away from the crowd in general, for a couple of hours to function properly.

I prefer rainy days to sunny days and I get excited when I see the first droplets of rain sprinkle from the clouds. As a child, my friends would look at me weirdly if I ever told them this, they always preferred the summer and the sun. The two I just mentioned represent happiness and joy and that's what their presence usually brings to people, as well. Meanwhile I'm the opposite: I prefer cold seasons to the warm ones and dark days to sunny ones. I can't choose a favorite between autumn and winter. I love autumn because of all of the warm colors that decorate the trees everywhere. But I love the winter because it's the only appropriate time to snuggle into a giant blanket with an oversized sweatshirt without ending up in a pool of sweat.

Although, I appreciate the sun. Without the sun, we wouldn't be able to admire the moon and I wouldn't be excited as I am when it would rain...because it'd constantly be raining and it'd get boring.

I think that my preference for the night and the rain is connected to the fact that I had a rough childhood. If it was raining, it was like the universe was crying with me, and I sought comfort in the dark sky.

I glance down at my phone to see that it's past midnight, and that I should be heading inside. I like hanging out on the roof, since I'm on the highest floor.

I get up and start climbing back inside when I realize that I'm hungry.

Are you hungry?

All the shops are closed at this hour so I can't even get anything to eat. What a pity. I have pickles inside. I have an unhealthy obsession with pickles, lemons and collecting notebooks. I have at least four notebooks at home. I find it impractical that I've written in all of them instead of writing all in one and leaving the rest clean for future events. Finishing a notebook is on my bucket list. I've had the same notebook since I was twelve, so eight years, and I still haven't finished it. Partly because when I buy a new notebook, I get side tracked and write in that one, like I mentioned before.

I recently went through all the pages in my current notebook and realized that there are 250 pages of which aren't completed. It's about an inch thick, I think. I'm not good with measurements, that sounds wrong but you get the idea. I enjoy reading while it rains and I've tried picking up art so many times. It all started when my Pinterest feed randomly started giving me really simple drawings with hacking shading, and I thought it'd actually be easy so I tried some of them in my notebook. It's safe to say art is not my thing.

Although, I like singing. Singing has been a way of channeling my emotions since the day I learned to speak. Sort of...
I don't consider myself very good at it, but just because I'm not the best at singing doesn't mean i'm going to give it up. It's for my personal satisfaction only.

I'm terrified of elevators. Once when I was seven, we were at this creepy hotel and my dad sent me up to the room we were staying in to get something and the elevator "broke" halfway up. Even before the incident I had an ick for elevators but back then I couldn't be bothered to go up the stairs, so when I got stuck it truly scared me. I haven't entered an elevator ever since. It's been thirteen years and I've done everything in my power to avoid elevators.

Anywho.

I make it through my balcony door to my apartment and smile to myself at the scent of my cinnamon-vanilla candles. I also have an unhealthy obsession for candles. I scurry through my small, but comfortable, apartment until I reach the kitchen and dig into it until I find the leftover pizza from last night. I know I said I wanted pickles, but I can't leave this pizza here, I simply cannot.

My hair, as always, is brought into a low bun at the nape of my neck, mostly because it gets tangled with a single gust of wind. My eyes are dark brown, so dark that if you don't look close enough you could exchange them for black, along with eyelashes that are dark but too thick to curl. I have a straight nose, littered with freckles that spread across my whole face but are most prominent on my nose and cheeks. My lips are too swollen to look right on my face but they're a nice pinkish color.

I take a bite of the cold pizza and make my way to the living room, turning on the TV, ready for another sleepless night.

word count: 1048
★★★★★★★★★★
hellooooo, I hope u guys enjoyed the first chapter and that it wasn't too boring. I promise it gets better, this is just a ✨taste✨. Lmk what y'all think in the comments and give me suggestions for the story as well, if you have any, I haven't completed the book yet so u never know. Anywho, hope ur day/night/evening/morning is good.
stay safe <3
-S