Surviving Cancer

Wednesday, October 25 Cont'd & Thursday, October 26

LEVI POV

I went back and checked on Maci, she was passed out. I turned the TV off, grabbed a clean shirt and quietly closed the door behind me.  I went back to Maci's room, changing my shirt and gave myself a once over in the mirror.  I had no idea when she was going to show up and my nerves were already through the roof.  I went downstairs, my dad was sprawled out across one of the couches.  I took a seat on the other couch, clicking my phone on and then off again.

"Is your sister sleeping?" My dad asked, his eyes never leaving the TV.

"Yeah." I said.

Neither of us said anything for a while, I could hear the shower running in their bedroom.  I checked my phone again and glanced out the window.

"Everything alright?" My dad asked, his eyes fixed on me.

"Yeah." I said again.

He watched me as I once again checked my phone and looked outside.  "Levi."

"Huh?" I mumbled as I watched the road outside.  I had no idea what "soon" meant to Jackie.

"Is everything alright son?" His voice was soft, "How are you?"

I shrugged my shoulders.  In a normal father son relationship this was when the son gave a vague "yeah" but with my dad there was no use in even trying to pull that.  He could see right through Maci and I.

"It's just, ya know." I said.  I didn't want to have to go into details.  He could fill in the blanks.

Unfortnately he wasn't going to play that game.  "It's what?"

"It just sucks." I mumbled.

My dad let out a sigh, turning the TV off.  Now I had his undivided attention.  "Tell me what's going on."  I shrugged my shoulders, glancing out the window again.  "Expecting someone?"

"No." I said instantly, "Yes.  Maybe, I don't know." My dad just continued to watch me.  "Jackie said she might swing by."  He nodded his head, "Just to talk." I felt the need to clarify.

"About what?" He asked.

"Stuff." I mumbled again, looking at my lap.  He cleared his throat, not asking me to elaborate but I knew that's what he was waiting for you.  I didn't want to tell him that my intentions when Jackie got here were not just to talk and that if we did talk it was going to be about Jennifer.

"Like what kind of stuff Levi." He pushed.  I ran my hand through my hair pulling at the ends.  My dad let out a sigh.  "Does it have to do with Jenny?"

I tried to hide the panic in my eyes as I glanced outside.  "No, why?"

"Well you called me the other day in hysterics begging to know her name." He recounted.  "So tell me why you need to know?"

I couldn't help but notice my dad's voice was a touch colder when he talked about Jennifer.  I knew it wasn't directed at me and I highly doubted he even noticed.  I didn't blame him either, I hated her too.

"It's nothing." I mumbled, checking my phone.

"Levi." He didn't have to say anymore.  I knew there was no getting out of this.

I let out a sigh, "It's not me okay.  I hate her too.  Maci made a bucket list.  She wants to meet her.  I'm just trying to, I don't know.  Make her dreams come true or something, keep her alive.  I don't know dad."

My tears came out of no where, I hadn't even felt like crying moments before but soon my dad had pulled me to my feet and wrapped his arms around me.  I cried like a little girl, my sobs coming out ragged as I tried to hold it in.