Teach Me How To Kiss

PDA

For the past few days, I've been waking to the same dream. Aaron and I are back in his bed, in a heated kiss, and he removed my bra this time. Only in my dream once he sees me completely topless, he backs off disgusted and says he should leave. Come on, you think I'd get some shameless action in my dreams at least but even they were punishing me.

It was already two weeks of being grounded. I was being extra nice and helpful around the house in hopes of winning my mother over to the merciful side, or at least in time for the Brown's annual pre-summer house party. Only one week away, I marked my calendar for this day in hopes it might be my shot with Isaiah. 

After showering and getting ready for school I paused in front of the hallway mirror. Every day I asked myself if I had done it. Was my hard shell cracked yet? Did Aaron save the prude I was afraid of becoming? In my opinion, yes. So why not display that to the world?

"What's wrong with being different? What's wrong with being me?" I smiled and pulled my ponytail free.

If a guy like Aaron could have a fun night making out with me and make me feel pretty, then maybe I should believe what he sees. I combed my fingers through my hair and adjusted my pack straps. Maybe it was my newfound confidence, but I never felt so happy in my plain white tee and jeans.

In the kitchen, I made my regular cereal bowl before taking off to the bus stop. My mother sat at the breakfast table with her coffee and laptop, watching me with a little grin. 

"Look at that beautiful head of hair, you should wear it down more often." She said and took a sip.

"Thanks, Mom. I think I will from now on." 

"What's gotten into you? You're glowing." 

"Nothing, just in a good mood I guess. Speaking of which, have you decided if you're going to let me go to Izzy's party?" I pouted.

"Hmm, we still haven't gone through all the details of what happened that Saturday, but you have pulled your weight around here. . . so if you promise to keep that up than I'll make an exception."

"You got it!" 

No one knew of my secret plans to inviting Aaron. Not that I needed a backup plan in case things with Isaiah didn't work out, but I sorta missed hanging out with him. He felt awful for what happened, but I think we just really missed kissing each other. At least I did. I got a few glances and a compliment on the bus, talk about ego boost. 

Ever since this thing with Aaron I've noticed another thing about myself, the lack of approval I needed from Izzy. Before, the minute I got off the bus I ran to find her and stayed no more than 3 feet away. Now, I had no reason to hurry. I didn't mind walking on my own for a little while. Maybe kissing him triggered my womanly metamorphosis.

"Well well, if it isn't, Little Miss Secrets." Izzy arched her brow, she still hadn't forgiven me. "You look pretty today, are you going to babysit the neighbor's kids again?"

I shook my head, biting my lip to refrain from snapping back. I knew I had to tell her about Aaron soon. It's been killing me not to share this news with anyone, and sadly, she's my only friend. I brushed off the comments and compliments and focused on class. Though knowing me, the daydreamer, the moment I disconnected from everybody else I drifted off to Aaron and that Saturday evening. 

You know that paranoid feeling you get when you sense you're being watched. . . it's because you are. I couldn't tell where it was coming from until I glanced around the classroom and found a blue set of eyes staring at me a few rows to my left. Yes, those babies I once held so dear and thought would be mine one day, except they were taking their damn sweet time making up their mind about me.