The Radiant Reira

19. The Last Stage of Grief

Orion's face was still healing and the pair had grown closer together. After communicating and taking the time to properly understand each other, their relationship continued to blossom. The same can be said for Orion and his mother, she had taken different shifts for work in order to be more present in her son's life. With that said, Orion still had some unresolved feelings he needed to confront.

Although he saw his mother trying, he felt as though what he experienced with his father was traumatic for him. He was still trying to handle the years of neglect and emotional abandonment.

How could he get over those long nights of sorrow caused by his parents?

Orion felt that even though his father was behind bars, he would always be with him. Orion would have to live with the fact that this was the family he was born into.

It was sunny outside, but he chose to stay indoors. He took a sip of his coffee and called Reira to come over. It had been a month and the pair hadn't been on their second date. Orion was focusing on other interests to distract himself from the recent events, and Reira had been hired for a part-time job; they still communicated through the phone but they only saw each other twice during that month.

Reira arrived at his place and both took a seat in the living room. "So, are you feeling better?" She asked.

"Yeah" He smiled, "I just wanted to talk to you about something."

Reira nodded.

"Well, have you ever experienced the feeling that pain will somehow hold on to you?" He asked.

"Uh, yeah actually" She responded, "I've told you about my experience with grief right?"

"Not really...I mean you told me about your brother and uh, how hard it was, but not really about the grieving process." He said.

Reira felt a little bit hesitant to explain the situation. She thought it would be too sad of a story to tell.  But in a way, she felt that he was going through different stages of grief. "There's denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. All in that order. But I didn't really experience it in that exact order."

"I think I learned from somewhere that not everyone follows that order." He said.

"Yeah, I also learned...that you don't need to lose someone to death in order to experience grief." Reira said.

Orion looked up at her.

"I'm sorry, I'm not trying to diagnose or anything like that." She shook her head.

"Oh, it's fine but what are you trying to say though?" He asked.

"I... wouldn't be surprised if you were grieving over what happened. And it's okay and normal actually. Do you feel like you lost your dad?"

Orion looked down, "I get what you're saying and yeah. You know, he was never there for us to begin with but seeing him act the way he did... Well, I felt like I was encountering a person I didn't even know." He sighed, "I loved him and still love him, but he's changed and I'm never going to see him again..." He began to tear up.

Reira hugged him, "It's okay, I'm listening."

He sniffled, "God, what are those stages again?" He asked, "Oh yeah, I guess I did go through some sort of denial cause I tried to make some excuse up in my mind that, I don't know, that he didn't mean it?"

Reira continued to allow Orion to let everything out. She was there for him, being the friend he needed.

"I thought to myself that if I hadn't flipped him off or brought up stuff I wasn't even supposed to know about him, maybe I wouldn't have triggered him. Maybe none of this would have happened. You could say I'm depressed too cause I literally haven't gone out at all other than the two times I've seen you, I just had such a hard time getting up in the morning and taking care of myself. I mean I went through anger too and I still am angry about it, so yeah... you're right, I'm just... going through the stages." Orion let out a big sigh of frustration.