The Radiant Reira

4. Another Night at Home

It was the first time where he actually had a silly interaction with someone in a long time. When it comes to working with people, they expect him to do all the work. When it comes to friends...let's just say his old ones are currently into the partying scene, and they think of him as a "workaholic." After finishing his assignments by 11 pm, he went downstairs to get a drink and saw his mom prepare her food for her night shift.

"Hey mom." He said,

"It's 11 you should be asleep."

"Mom, it feels like we.. um haven't spoken in forever, how have you been?" He asked, looking down.

"Fine." She took a moment to look at him and then she continued to rush getting her things ready. "You should be asleep. I heard finals are around the corner, you're preparing for that right?" She asked sternly.

"Yeah mom, I'm always preparing but-" He stopped himself and took a good look at his mother.

She was exhausted from a lack of sleep and she seemed to have no interest in speaking to her son. "I have to go. Go to sleep."

No hug or kiss, no "I love you." He went upstairs with tears in his eyes, drowned in the feeling that no matter how hard he tried to build something with his mother, it wouldn't work. After the attempted conversation, for the hundredth time, regret ended up being at the front of his mind. Loneliness is a recurring feeling yet he still tries to fight it, not allowing it to affect the way he treats others.

Tonight he had many thoughts running through his mind, including the feeling that his mother works overtime to avoid him and that maybe, he's not being a good son. Throughout the day he has school work and the plans for the future to keep him occupied. Nevertheless, at the very end of the day it's him alone with his thoughts and those thoughts during the late night aren't exactly the happiest.

After the tears went away, he thought of Reira, he mainly thought about meeting up with her tomorrow, and although he was nervous, it was something for him to look forward to. He let out a grin thinking about her "imagination" joke, and for once he had something to smile about during one of these nights. Truthfully, laughter and funny references wasn't a big part of his life. Her little joke brought him back to a time when he was child, simply enjoying the show on TV with his little fruit snacks, with no recurring feelings of heartache. He missed being a child because those days involved him being fully present. No matter what hurt him, he had the understanding that he was still whole, he had the idea that when you're young, you don't allow the bad events to define you or your worth. The feeling of reminiscing on those memories as a child was always bittersweet.