If this was a Movie || NORENMIN

xvii

"I'd go back in time and change it, but I can't
So if the chain is on your door, I understandBut this is me swallowin' my pride
Standin' in front of you sayin' I'm sorry for that night
And I go back to December
It turns out freedom ain't nothin' but missin' you
Wishin' I'd realized what I had when you were mine
I'd go back to December, turn around and make it alright"

******

Jeno and Jaemin both grabbing Renjun's hands and walk out from the wedding. Not far from the wedding, they sat down on a bench at the wedding's garden. Renjun in the middle while Jeno and Jaemin beside him. Still not letting the older hands go.

"So."

"Well."

The two husbands speak at the same time, well it's cute. Renjun thought to himself.

"You first honey," Jeno letting Jaemin to speak first.

The younger nodded. He look at Renjun with both hands holding to Renjun's hand like holding to his dear life. "Renjun. There's so many things I want to say and apologize for. But first let me say something that I really wanna say from 9 years ago," He take a deep, a very deep breath and let out.

"You are very beautiful man I've ever saw in my life. A man that instantly took my breath away for the first our eyes met. You took me to another whole level. And yes, I still think you are very beautiful, and God, your brain is so sexy that I can't compare it to anyone else. You are my first love and still are," he stop. Once again, he exhale all bravery and courage to himself, "So, Huang Renjun. I loved you. And I still loving you. I never stop loving you even until I married Jeno. I always love you."

Jaemin look at Renjun one last time before he let go of the man's hand. Looking at him, Renjun look pale, more like, he is so shocked that he stop breathing for a moment.

"Jun," this time, Jeno called. "Junie. I know what I did is wrong. It was wrong of me to push and yell at you calling you homewrecker and slut in the library. From that day until now, I've never stop regretting every single day about it. Fuck, I am blinded with jealousy when I didn't even with whom I'm jealous of. But instead, I chose to be jealous at you because I think that is the most plausible thing to think. And gosh, I shouldn't called the person I love those mess up words. And yes Jun. I do love you. Jaemin make me realize I do in love with you. But I'm too coward to recognize my own feelings for you. I'm too scared to acknowledge this, in fear that what I'm feeling is not normal. But Jun-" The man stop. He tighten his grip.

"After you're gone, I'm so sorry for saying this. But it feels like, a part of me is gone. It like you take away half of my life with you and left me unbreathing. I know it messed up, but damn, if I could go back to those days, I wish I could punch myself for calling you names even though you are my best friend. A best friend that I've been taking for granted." Jeno look at Renjun one last time, "So, Huang Renjun. I loved you. And I still love you. I never stop loving you even until I married Jaemin. I always love you."

It's like a sudden pang to Renjun's heart. His eyes get watery. Damn, this is not his wedding, but why he's getting emotional.

He stand up aggressively. Pulling his hand that Jeno still hold. He look at both of Jeno and Jaemin.

"After all these years? Huh! Really? It easy for you to say you love me. And Mr Lee Jeno, how am I supposed to believe that? You are the type of person that will throw hates for whoever tried to get between you and Jaemin. And God, you both confess to me? You think I will back to be your friends after this? YOU, OF ALL PEOPLE, HUMILIATE ME IN FRONT OF OUR FRIENDS AND SCHOOL! CALLING ME NAMES AND ALL! SLUT! BITCH! DO I NEED TO REMIND YOU?!

And wait. What's the point of your confession? You both are married for goddamn sake. I don't wanna be a HOMEWRECKER." He look at Jeno with enrage. "Jeno, I loved you. And yes, it you, you fool. I've been in love with you for all these years. But guess what? I choose to walk away because you are my best friend. I held back my feelings for you because I know you deserve better. I tried to be happy for you because I know, your happiness is not with me, it's with Jaemin. But you? How could you pushed me away like I'm some kind of dirt to your relationship. And now this?"

And a second away, he look at Jaemin, "Jaemin, I've never hated you. And I know you mean well to me. It just, you took away my love and my best friend away from me. like really away. And until now, I hate that about you. But your confession? You loved me before Jeno? I don't understand. How could you love me when you're in relationship with Jeno? It doesn't add up. Is this some kind of prank? If it is, God! I hate you both so damn much." Renjun raise his eyebrows, both arms at his chest, hugging himself. Questioning the two actions and words. Everything to him is confusing and so messed up. All he could this is, this is all a set up or a prank for him.

Jeno stand up, holding the older arms, "No, please listen. I know this is sound crazy. But please Renjun. Listen to us. Jaemin love you more than you could think. He accepted my confession thinking it'll bring us three together. But it my fault for breaking his dream of relationship of 3. And I know, this is too much for you, but please Junie, I wish you give us a chance. A chance to make you happy. A chance to make your life more colorful. Please. I love you so damn much that I couldn't do anything else beside you and Jaemin. Please," Jeno plead.

But the youngest among them keep silent. Renjun indirectly confess his feelings to Jeno without them realizing. But Jaemin heard all of them very clearly. Now he knows that Renjun is actually in love with Jeno all this while. That is why Renjun is mad at him. He feel bad, really bad. He look at Renjun, stand up in front of him. And say:

"Junie. Will you try to be in relationship with us? Just a trial? And if it hard for you to accept us back, I swear, I'll back away." The younger try to look Renjun in the eye.

Renjun sigh. For him, this is too much to take. All he can think of is to get away from here. But after the confessions, 4 months of trying to talk with him, their consistence apologies, he gave up of running away. "Give me time to think. And mind you, I am a plus one. So, this is not a relationship of 3, but 4."

The youngers beam. They skip a bit and jump for a group hug. A bit relive when Renjun is showing sign that he is getting better with them.

"And Jaemin, tell me how to love you. Because I swear, I've never in love with anyone except Jeno." Renjun push softly Jeno and Jaemin.

Jaemin create his sweetest smile to Renjun. "I will, and you will never regret from loving the Na Jaemin."

"And Jeno, don't think I forgive you that easy. Earn it yourself. You hurt others too without knowing." He said while glaring at the younger who tried to engulf him in a hug but getting pushed away harshly.

What he said is true, they ended up hurting Sicheng and Yuta's relationship because Sicheng too decide to follow Renjun to China leaving Yuta and his insecure feelings for Sicheng, ended up starting new with Taeyong. While Sicheng, having a hard time getting over him. But that's how he met Jaehyun, his now belove husband that he meet on Yuta's wedding 3 years ago.

And gosh, Chenle's and Jisung's relationship almost broken over how Chenle always nag that Jisung didn't pay attention to him anymore after they left to China. He said Jisung is starting to fall apart from their relationship.

Well, he hate everything about him leaving, making everyone around him crumble into pieces, but he couldn't help it. He needed the space so much.